Billie and Verka returned to the stage. "Thank you, Europe, for voting in this Eurovoice contest," said Billie. "We've loved every minute, and we hope you have too."Billie continued: "Now, to announce the results of Eurovoice XXVII, please put your hands together for a very special man..."Verka added: "Найгірший Прем'єр комісар в історії...""A true European legend...""анти-канабіс егоїстичний засранець...""The man who makes it all possible...""Вони повинні повернути Стоксейліус...""PETER!""МОНТФОРТ!!!"Montfort rose onto the stage amidst blinding lights and the X Factor judges' music, using the same contraption that had brought Billie on to the stage at the start of the show. To rapturous applause, he nodded to the hosts and stepped forward, waving about a golden envelope. He lifted up his arm to calm the crowd, and they quietened down. A sole female voice cried out "I WANT YOU, PETER MONTFORT!""Thank you Billie. Verka. Hello, Europe! Or should I say, Cepry Hej, Europe?""It's been a great pleasure to organise the results of the first Eurovoice of this Noviy God. What great entries we've had! Let's have a round of applause for all our entries!"The audience obliged"All eleven of you, no matter where you come tonight, even if your position in the standings is a real Tragedy, just Know The Sun Will Shine, and Scare Away The Dark. You're all Heroes this evening! But, of course, there's only one trophy here, and only one entry can Come And Get It. Everyone else will just have to Let It Go, even if it leaves them in Stitches. Will the next EV be a game of Saint Regina Whispers? Or will we be playing Ex's And Oh's back here in Halsberg in two months' time? Demet Akalin.""So, without further ado, the winner of Eurovoice XXVII is..."Montfort painstakingly opens the envelope"With 82 points, Shawn Mendes - Stitches, from Aalen! Congratulations to Aalen, a first-time EV winner!""On the screen behind me and in your TV screens at home should be the full results.""So, as ever, I'd like to finish by congratulating Shawn and all the other entries, and to thank them, and our wonderful hosts in Halsberg, and all the other broadcasters, and everyone who made this event possible. I wish you all a Happy Easter, and I hope to see you all again in Aalen in May! To sing us out with his winning song, Stitches, here's Shawn Mendes! Goodnight, Europe!"
IBC would like to congradulate Verka Serduchka on her victory. The winning song will no doubt be a hit across all of Europe on New Years'. We look forward to the contest in Halsberg. Furthermore, we would like to congratulate Mr. Montfort on completing his first competition as EV Director. Timing for this contest was strained, and the amount of entered countries (many of which were debuting) and gaffes were high, nervermind the tremendously close and controversial results - and it all somehow came together and rather smoothly. Thanks for pulling this all off!
Masterpiece CollectionAs part of our permanent collection we have the following artefacts deemed the "Masterpiece Collection" on display all year at the Louvre Museum.From left to right: Mona Lisa, Venus de Milo, Code of Hammurabi, Winged Victory of Samothrace, Virgin of the Rocks, Seated Scribe From left to right: The Wedding at Cana, Liberty leading the People, The Raft of the MedusaFrom left to right: Whistler's Mother, Oath of Horatii, The Death of Sardanapalus
The details of the celebration of the 200th Anniversary of the founding of the nation of Framptonia have no been officially confirmed. Framptonia is pleased that the Heads of State from Montenbourg, Havvenskar and Inimicus will be joining us in our celebrations.The Schedule of Events for our guests will be as follows:Tuesday, 1st December 2015 commencing at 11 ama tour of the Monastery of St Bogwulfluncha visit to unique Batemans distillery at Waxfleet St Bogwulf, where the world renowned Cabbage liqueur, Eau de Choux is producedan evening concert of Framptonian choral music performed by the St Bogwulf SingersWednesday, 2nd December 2015a morning visit to the salt marshes of Scudness to witness the rare Sea Otters and Framptonian Oystercatchers, followed bylunch at the National Kabbarj Museuman afternoon tour of the nearly complete International Travel Hub, known as Boris Islandan evening State Banquet at the the Presidential Palace in LimpdomThursday, 3rd December 2015, commencing at 2:00 pmattendance at the finals of the national Kabbarjidditch finalsfollowed by a national firework display.[size=1.5]nb: Kabbarjidditch is the national sport of Framptonia, being a cross between soccer, polo and quidditch centring around the pursuit of the extremely rare and valuable bullet cabbage.[/size]
A Socialist MP from Portland responded in a monotonous sarcastic voice. "So I can see the wonderful people that I love in the Royal Chambre. They're just great. Going there just fills me with the joy of a thousand happy bunnies."
Delphine had just woken up to the news of the Portland Election. “Oh, merde.” She muttered to herself, whilst putting on her Hillary Clinton brand Pantsuit. (Theme Plays)It was the first day in which the Governor of Portland would be present at the National Cabinet meeting. Madam Secredairy and the Prime Minister were about to meet again. But before that, Prime Minister Cormier was to meet with her Deputy and Chancellor, Kitty Spears and Tina Mountain. “Is my driver here?” Delphine asked the Housekeeper.“Yes ma’am, he’s just outside. In a rush are we?” The Housekeeper, Jade, asked.“As always.” Delphine smiled.The car sped across Saint Regina. From the North-Western Hills where her residence is, to the centre where the Royal Chambre des Délégués is. The skyline pierced the grey and miserable sky. Winter was coming. And it was at the unfortunate stage where the trees were now even losing their orange, yellow, and brown leaves: Leaving them empty shells of what was, and providing no relief from the greyscape that would occupy the city. “Thank you Fergus.” Delphine said, whilst exiting the car in the proper way. Both feet on the ground before getting out. Delphine climbed the stairs up into the Party of June’s Delegate’s offices and into her office with two chairs set out for the Deputy PM, and the Chancellor. Also there were biscuits and Nicoleizian Apple Tea. Delphine sat down, poured herself some tea, took a biscuit and awaited the arrival of her colleagues. “Hi Delphine.” Tina Mountain said.“Hello Prime Minister.” Kitty followed. They put down their briefcases and poured themselves some tea. Tina made noises of discontent when Kitty took more than her fair share of the tea. “I wouldn’t worry too much about Kitty taking all the tea, Tina. There’ll be plenty of tea when Kelis gets here.” Delphine said, rolling her eyes.“Delphine, I’m sure it won’t be too bad.” Tina said, trying to calm the angered PM.Delphine tried to respond, but the phone started ringing. She put it on speaker.“Hello, Delphine?” The phone voice said, crackling.“Yes it’s me.” She replied.“Umm… Mario Lopez has taken over as Governor of South Regina. Is it wise to keep him and Kelis in the same room?” The phone voice continued.“Of course, it’ll make a great Celestial Body cover, if anything happens. Bring your camera.” Delphine replied and hung up. “Good God.” She continued.“If I may, Prime Minister, we should really talk about our fiscal responsibility targets.” Mrs Mountain went on.“I don’t care, Mountain. I want to tear that woman limb from limb. I just know she’s going to cause a right issue in my cabinet.” Delphine said, fanning her face with her hand.“We’re never going to get anything done, are we?” Kitty asked Tina.“No… It seems we’re not. I was going to ask about de-nationalising the Rare Earth Mines, to anger Kelis. She has no power there.”Delphine’s face lit up. “That’s perfect. Blackmail. Just what we need.” “Hello all.” Delphine said to her cabinet, and the rather unwelcome Governors of the independent assemblies. “We’re gathered here today to brief you on our Government Policy, that you will of course have limited power to stop. Of course we know about the Dairy Referendum results…” She said, ogling Kelis. “And we will all comply with the people’s choice. Please, raise your hand if you do not wish to comply with the democratic process.”A soul hand wavered in the space. The room turned cold and silent, as Kelis kept her hand raised like a defiant milkshake. “Kelis. Why am I not surprised?” Delphine asked.“Oh. I’m very sorry. Did my back hurt your knife?” Kelis.Delphine’s eyes became watery. “Don’t you DARE use Mean Girls quotes against me, Kelis.”“You are a MEAN GIRL.” Kelis replied.“You’re testing me Kelis. That’s ill-advised.” Delphine responded.“I’m going to legalise dairy in Portland. And you can’t stop me, Delphine.” Kelis continued throwing the logs into the raging fire.At this point, Mario Lopez, deemed ‘his kaukkw’ in South Regina stood up and said: “Now you should really listen to the people, Kelis. Delphine is right.”“I’m sorry I don’t like to brown nose people, Mario. Can you please return to the Mushroom Kingdom and save that blonde bimbo from the clutches of a large reptillian.” Kelis replied.“Leave my dear Courtney Laine Mazzaout of this, Kelis.” Mario said.“I was talking about Delphine and Tina Mountain.” Kelis chuckled“There’s no need, Kelis. And, if you do legalise it in Portland, the Rare Earth mines will be de-nationalised and you will lose partial funding to your government. Kapeesh.” Delphine said, folding her arms. “If you really wish to blackmail the Portlandish people then so be it. But be advised that I will not let partial defunding and de-nationalisation be blamed on me. It’ll be VERY public who allowed this to happen. I can see it now. Planes flying across the Portland skies reading ‘Delphine took you jobs and your health care. Free Portland. Vive la Revolución!'” Kelis continued. “Fine, we will consider renegotiations in my office after the meeting.” Delphine conceded.“If that’s all we have to hear about milk, then we shall get onto the important matters of state.” Delphine said.The cabinet meeting went on. Kelis gave the evils to everyone in the room. Often making eyes at people. An overall uncomfortable meeting for everyone involved.“What the fuck was that, Kelis?” Delphine asked, when they had relocated to the PM’s office.“I do what I need to do to get what I want.” Kelis replied.“This is exactly the thing you DON’T do to get what you want. I will not permit you to legalise it in Portland. It was a national consensus.” Delphine said.“Bull-fucking-shit.” Kelis said. And kicked Delphine under the desk.“What the fuck was that?” Delphine said, grabbing Kelis from across the desk. Kelis flung a smack onto Delphine. Delphine hit straight back with deadly poignancy. A fight broke out in the office, glasses were smashed, vases broken, Party of June mugs decimated. It raged until they were both pulling each other’s hair. And when one pulled the other followed suit. “Just…” Delphine started, breathless. “Stop this.” “Urrrrrrrrrrrgh…” Kelis groaned. “Sure.” She said sighing and defeated.“I’ve missed you.” Delphine admitted. “I’ve missed you too.” Kelis said, sobbing.The two shared a long hug. “I’ve got an idea.” Delphine said. “We should have a Portland referndum to determine the legality of Dairy in Portland”Kelis’ eyes lit up. “That’d be… agreeable”“Oh come on Kelis. You want that.” Delphine said.“Perhaps I do…” Said Kelis.“But… you must promise to not to legalise it before the Referendum is started.” Delphine asked.“It’ll be our little secret.” Kelis replied, laughing.“No more Mean Girl quotes!” Delphine said, in mock pain. Inside of course she was relieved.Kelis went down the stairs, and left via the VIP secret exit and met her fiancée, Jacques Barker. “Sup Jacques.” She said, fiddling with the buttons on his coat. “We’re going back to Saint Pierre.” Kelis said, with a beaming smile.“So you got what you wanted?” Jacques asked.“Not exactly. I’ll tell you about it on the train.” She replied, still smiling cheek to cheek. “Of course. Let’s go.” Jacques replied. “Back to the bleeding arctic circle.” “It’s hardly better here!” Kelis replied, laughing. Little did they know that Delphine was looking out of the window of her office, sobbing. Sobbing for the loss you can’t describe. Someone snatched from you. Delphine may have been the Prime Minister, but had no meaningful relationships anymore. Kelis, despite losing the referendum, had Jacques and a large network of friends. She’d go home to the companionship of Jacques. Delphine would go home to a house too large for her. Life’s sometimes easy for Madam Secredairy.
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