Office of the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

  • Office of the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

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    Current Prime Minister: The Rt. Hon. Karen Inoue, MP (Conservative - UEC)

  • 7 December 2011

    I hope everyone in Europe are having a wonderful election season as we begin to put together our new European Commission and European Court of Justice. It is absolutely vital that we as Europeans take control of our government and hold it accountable so that all Europeans can share in the new freedoms and policies that will continue to be the sole focus of its councillors.

    I will be conducting what has been named a "European Foreign Policy Tour" in my country, and I invite any additional invitations for a state visit. My government and I have stood by the belief that isolationism politics is dead and that we must reach out to all of our European brothers to ensure a greater communication and tackle our common issues. E-mails and telegrams are, at the moment, the quickest way to get a response from me as I am currently taking a short holiday in Canterbury before heading to our first stop: Dominion Heights in the Duxburian Union.

    I hope you all will join me in helping to bring greater brotherhood to Europe.

    The Rt. Hon. Nick Clegg, MP (Liberal Democrats - EFP)
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

  • 31 December 2011

    Greetings Britons and Europeans around the Union,

    I would like to take this time to wish you all a happy ending to the holiday season as we venture into the New Year together. May we see Europe grow and prosper.

    I am writing you today to announce that there are two nations on which which Britain will no longer be trading: Mongolia and Marrakechia.

    Mongolia's nuclear weapons program is dangerously unmonitored and instead of allowing the Union to work with it to produce these weapons. The ENAA is not an organization that can be laughed at, and as a group of nations united in the ideas of peace, we cannot stand for such blatant violations. Britain has shut off trade to its nation and warns Britons who visit Mongolia to please leave immediately, as all ships, planes, and other transportation devices will be banned by the Home Department and the Border Control from entering the nation.

    Marrakechia is a nation that has warred against a people who have felt under-represented and marginalized by their home government, and have resorted to violence in hopes that their government may finally hear their requests. Saharan and Marrakechian citizens who have been displaced and have called Britain home have voiced their opinions in the streets of London and Edinburgh, calling for an independent Saharan nation, but the Marrakechian government refuses to do so. Until the government of Marrakechia grants the Sahara independence, Britain's borders and trade are closed to its peoples effective immediately. No Marrakechian company will maintain shares in Britain, and all Marrakechian products will be banned from the British market. It is a full embargo and border shut down to all those except the displaced from this conflict. No Briton will be allowed to visit Marrakechia, nor will any international transport that makes a stop anywhere in Britain.

    It is unfortunate that it has come to this for these two nations, but until policy is reversed, there will be no British monies reaching their government or peoples.

    Thank you, and Happy New Year.

    The Rt. Hon. Nick Clegg, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland
    Written from D?sseldorf, Rhine Ruhr

  • 6 January 2011

    A Joint Statement with the Office of the Prime Minister and European Council Representative Rushanara Ali

    Ladies and gentlemen of Europe,

    It is with great concern that we view the ENAA amendment process as irresponsible and reckless legislation written hastily and not addressing the real issues at hand: structural faults and out of date references. Its writing is not what we are concerned about, but that Councillors of the European Union seem to have it in their minds that we should all be forced to rewrite legislation just for the sake of amending legislation.

    It is not the Council's job to write in legislation in reaction to a one-off situation like the one in Mongolia. Mongolia's problem has consistently been its dictatorial military regime that is still in place. The national governments of Europe all contain power to trade with whomever, barring any treatises or agreements that would make that impossible. In particular, it is very evident that the Offalian representative has been requesting this in order to justify the right to sanction. We cannot allow the European legislature to turn into an arena of amendments for every single special case possible, particularly when the national governments of Europe already retain the rights to use their own justification. It is our job to decide what is best for Europe, and what is best is an immediate sanction by all nations, either voted upon in Council or handled by our own national governments. We are showing a cowardice and fear by looking to amend laws for a special case in order to seemingly justify an act that can be handled at the national level.

    We are also deeply concerned that the European Union will become an easily deceived and side-tracked legislature that is not willing to look at the facts of each law. This whole issue could have been avoided by simply asking ourselves: if we are all calling for an overhaul of the system, why rush it through Council only to redo it? As the old saying goes, do it right the first time. This goes for amendments, as well. It is very noble that the Corelian colleague of mine has taken up the charge to do the amendments, and none of this resides with her. It is with the rest of us who are demanding for action from the Council, forcing our Councillors into the position of creating hasty changes. Re-evaluate what you can do on the national level before forcing the Council and Commission into rash, hurried decisions that could cost us efficiency and political trust from out citizens.


    Councillor Rushanara Ali
    European Council Representative of the United Kingdom

    The Office of the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

  • 3 February 2012

    Ladies and gentlemen; Britons across Europe,

    It is with great joy that I announce today that the travel and trade embargo with Marrakechia has been lifted after consideration of the Sahara situation by the Home Department and the Foreign Ministry. We have deemed the situation safe for Britons to travel and trade with Marrakechia, and we hope that in the future, this will not have to happen again for our long-standing neighbours.

    Let us continue to work towards pan-European peace through diplomacy, democracy, and understanding.

    The Rt. Hon. Nick Clegg, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

  • 14 April 2012

    Ladies and gentlemen,

    It has come to my attention that the people of Laois-Offaly have been upset with the Duxburian Union for quite some time, as evidenced by the protests and the withdrawal of their ambassador to the nation. However, I must only feel disappointment when effigies of their politicians are being burned in the streets. It is not becoming of a friend of Briton to be displaying such uncivilized behaviour in the capital, and I must urge the populace of Laois-Offaly to show some restraint. Demonstrations are purely democratic and completely acceptable, but the burning of effigies only reflects negatively upon your nation. I would be happy to host both parties in Britain for a deeper discussion and understanding.

    I also am making an announcement via the official wire that the Liberal Democrats will decide officially the permanency of our Euro-party affiliation in a few days. I urge my party to cease operating in factions and come together to work for the best interests of Britain and Europe.

    The Rt. Hon. Nick Clegg, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

  • 29 October 2012

    Ladies and gentlemen,

    It is with a heavy heart that I wish my condolences on the nation of Occoron and their government at this very difficult time. As has been reported on television everywhere in Britain, the tragic gas explosion accident has claimed the lives of men, women, and children who were in the way of what can only be described as pure accident. Our hearts are with the families of the victims; we cannot forget that these were the loved ones, the pride and joy of these families and those who had not yet realized their whole lives. Stay with the victims in Occoron and do what you can to help.


    The Rt. Hon. Michelle Branch, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

    Se?oras y se?ores,

    Es con gran tristeza que me gustar?a que mis condolencias a la naci?n de Occoron y su gobierno en este momento tan dif?cil. Como se ha reportado por televisi?n en todas partes en el Reino Unido, el accidente tr?gica explosi?n del gas ha cobrado la vida de hombres, mujeres y ni?os que estaban en el camino de lo que s?lo puede ser descrito como puro accidente. Nuestros corazones est?n con las familias de las v?ctimas, no podemos olvidar que estos eran los amados, el orgullo y alegr?a de estas familias y los que no se hab?a dado cuenta todav?a de toda su vida. Qu?date con las v?ctimas en Occoron y haz lo que pueda para ayudar.


    El Rt. Hon. Michelle Branch, MP
    El Primer Ministro del Reino Unido de Gran Breta?a e Irlanda

  • 23 December 2012

    My fellow Britons,

    The Government and I have not desired to speak on the Telum incident until more details surfaced about what has happened, and because there have been several international news reports with the same information, yet varying opinions on the subject, I thought it best to tell my people where the Government stands on the issue.

    We do not, under any circumstance, condone the use of chemical weaponry on any member of humanity. It is immoral, it is dangerous, and barbaric to use such weaponry on your own people, and for that the government of Inimicus has lost respect internationally and legitimacy to its own people.

    However, the response from the Duxburian Union is identical to mine. We will not pursue sanctions, because we would be punishing a populace that has already been punished more than the leadership of the government. If anything, sanctions provide a dangerous means of leading to backlash against those who sanction, and I will not put this country at risk. If sanctions are to be used, it needs to be targeted at something that minimizes the effect it has on the people of Inimicus, but maximizes its effect on the government.

    Finally, the Government will remain respectfully silent regarding the manner in which other nations have gone after the "Telum Incident", as it is been referred to be international media. When asked properly, we will consider options on the table, but not without first seeing what the Premier has to say in regards to negotiation results. It is not pertinent that we sanction everyone that makes a mistake immediately, or else those who have been the most vocal about it look to tear the Union apart. Reasoning must come first, and then action. Until that moment, we will continue to do what is best for Britain.

    Thank you.

    The Rt. Hon. Dr. Michelle Branch, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland

  • 23 July 2013

    Britons and Europeans,

    Yesterday marked the second anniversary of the London transit system attacks lead by the Crusade Against Corrupt Britain. The attacks on the United Kingdom brought countless lives altered, loved ones killed, and a nation shocked and hurt. Britain, though, showed resolve as did Europe, and the Union stood beside us as we picked up the pieces, kept calm, and carried on.

    However, today, the mastermind of the attacks is facing his crimes in London at Old Bailey, under two miles away from the scene of greatest destruction. Although it has proven not possible to be heard in front of his peers, he is answering to the representatives of the people of Britain and to the Europeans he slaughtered. If convicted of his crimes, he will be sentenced to a life in prison. Parliament today is currently debating whether or not he must answer his crimes with capital punishment, including death, as well as criminals of other terrorist acts.

    It is with the cooperation of the European Union that Britain has been able to track down Mr. Davies, thanks to intelligence from Pax Aurea, Os Corelia, the German Empire, the Duxburian Union, the Confederacy of Gun-Toting Animals, and our other partners in intelligence. We in Britain are grateful that we are collaborating with the great peoples of this region to bring someone who killed under the false claims of religion to justice. I am a practising Christian, and shudder to think of someone who could use the words of Jesus Christ or any of the prophets and apostles to kill.

    We thank you for your patience as we bring a European criminal to justice where the European Court of Justice left off, and we thank you for your cooperation.

    The Rt. Hon. Karen Inoue, MP
    Prime Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland