Scandinavian Times: September 2015

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  • The Scandinavian Times

    OSLO-- The death of 108 year old Supreme Court Justice Roxanne Wong has created an opening on the bench. As a result, the Folketing had a big job today to diced to replace the void seat. Here are the 5 candidates' debates:

    Tobias Zhu, the Former CEO of Kalmara Products, says, "I have long sat by and watched our government viciously attack the big businesses in this country. The government has no right to control businesses and I will adopt that position in all of my judgements."

    Reverend Fanny Patel is nominee #2. The Reverend says, "I am sick and tired of the liberals in this country ruining our family values. Every day they assault our basic sense of decency. You must vote for me to keep our families safe. Think of the children!"

    Gay Activist and former Senator Sean Thiesen is nominee #3. "Our people aren't happy, we need more freedom, we need more civil rights. We must keep the government out of the bedroom. We must respect people's right to privacy and remember that personal relations are just that, personal."

    Environmental Activist Clint Frederickson argues, "Our government has been constantly violating Mother Earth and her rights, all our politicians talk about are civil rights, civil rights this, civil rights that, blah blah blah. We aren't important, what is important is the Earth!"

    The last nominee is the retired Five Star General Kathleen Cho. "We are ridiculed throughout the international community for our low quality weaponry, our police and military numbers are not sufficient. Our military must be protected from both constitutional and civilian oversight. They should be given money, and a free hand."

    Thus, the Folketing elected the senator of the Folketing and gay rights activist, Senator Sean Theissen.

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