Nicoleizian Election '16

  • Leaders of the Parties, and their Parties' Policies:

    National Awakening Party:


    Lady Georgie Campbell is a Socialite and "Champion of the Bourgeoisie", according to the Socialist Party. She was born in Saint Regina, whilst her parents were staying there in the "Saint Regina Season", when the Aristocracy would come from their large homes in the Countryside to their townhouses in upmarket Saint Regina. Becoming an MP in the 2015 Coup against the Party of June, she, in just one year rebirthed a party, and gave it new meaning & life. Her Policies would include:

    • Cutting public services in order to maintain a budget surplus.
    • De-nationalising everything non-essential.
    • Selling parts of the Health Services, to improve service.
    • Banning Sex-education.
    • Increasing the size of the military.

    Party of June:


    Prescott was born in Portland City, and was formerly the Socialists Mayor of the City before he joined the PoJ. He was the Minister of Defense in the Cormier administration, serving as the person who increased Military spending significantly. He was also the Minister of Defense in the short-lived Cox/Page administration but changed in the June 2015 election to the PoJ. His policies would include:

    • Reducing the budget deficit.
    • Respecting the Dairy Referendum, where Dairy was outlawed.
    • Ending the Ministry of EV due to the killing of Doc Mustard.
    • Devolving more power to the Dominions.
    • Increasing expenditure on Healthcare and Education by increasing tax rate on the rich.

    Portland Nationalist Party:


    Kelis was one of the leading pro-Dairy advocates in the Dairy Referendum, where, she ended up losing. Despite this, the attitude in Portland, where she grew up were firmly on her side. Therefore, she decided to run for the Portland Nationalist Party in order to try and remove Portland from the 9 Dominions. Her policies would include:

    • Legalising dairy.
    • Removing the Dominion of Portland and the Dominion of Saint Pierre from the 9 Dominions of Icholasen.
    • More freedom for the 2 Portlander Dominions.
    • None of Portland's resources (rare earth metals, oil, and fish) to go to Regina, and they all should be nationalised.
    • No more military installations to be built in Portland.

    Socialist Party:


    Taylor Swift is a 5th Placing Eurovoice participant. She was born in Portland, but moved to South Regina to pursue a career in country singing. In doing so, she became very accustomed to looking after animals. Finally, Taylor's parents could let her take care of herself. Additionally, she almost died in a plane crash in the TS, and has had major reconstructive surgery to restore her face & body after the collision. Her policies include:

    • Nationalising all industry.
    • Increasing corporation tax by 26%.
    • Reducing VAT on items such as alcohol and cigarettes.
    • Banning the Ministry of EV.
    • Reducing military spending.

    Parti Nationaliste Romanique:


    Anne-Marie Cormier was born in Saint Romain, and represented Romain in "Ichovision" in 1973. She is the mother of Delphine Cormier, and they have staunchly different views. She is a traditionalist Romain Nationalist, believing in independence for Romain and and integration deal with Miraco, despite calls from other parties saying it's impossible to achieve such a deal with them. Her policies would include:

    • Independence for Romain.
    • French taught as a compulsory language in all schools.
    • French being adopted as Icholasen's only language.
    • The Catholic Church should play a larger role in schools and government.
    • Romain should not be under Anastasia's rule.

    Liberal Democratic Socialist Party:


    Schmocks is a Nicoleizian speaker born in Saint Novella. She was the Chancellor under Laverne Cox's term from 2010-2015. However, there was a major controversy in her time as Chancellor. The debt tripled an the budget deficit increased massively. However, the standard of living increased massively, and the number of food-banks in her administration fell by 30%. Her policies would include:

    • Keynesian economics to increase the economic output.
    • No more nationalisation.
    • A better immigration policy, to benefit Nicoleizian workers, whose jobs have been jeopardised by foreign immigrants.
    • Increase in healthcare and education spending.
    • Remove the welfare cap.

  • Endorsement - Richard Dawkins, Archbishop of Saint Regina:

    "As an Archbishop I know it isn't my place to endorse a candidate, but I can see God shine through LGC [Lady Georgie Campbell]. She's committed to protecting our children from the Sin that is Sex Education, and she's committed to banning the teaching of evolution in our schools. As well as this, she herself is a Christian Woman of Jesus, and Jesus would be proud to make her one of his disciples. No doubt, when the second coming comes and the homosexuals, the Atheists and everyone else who doesn't serve our Mighty God is engulfed in flames, there Lady Georgie Campbell will rise. She will rise with a hole of light sucking her up to Heaven, like how soup is sucked up by an overweight Miracan. And when our Christian & Faithful Supreme Royal Premier seeks an audience with our Almighty God, she will say "Forgive the Nicoleizians. They are truly a good people... Don't fill Saint Regina with lava please." and God will listen. And all of Icholasen will be risen up to Heaven, and the people in Heaven will marvel at its beauty.

    Along with her Piety, LGC will bring a good sense of Anti-Dairy rhetoric to the forefront of politics. Of course we all know Dairy is anti-God, as it clearly says in the Bible. LGC has committed to banning Dairy across this entire island, leaving no trace of the SIN it once emulated across this island. And for that I applaud her. She has no qualms with admitting the Truth, and enacting policies in the best interests of our children. Do children need "calcium" to get "strong bones"? No they don't. They need to break their bones repeatedly so they grow back stronger. It is as God intended it. And along with dairy, our children should be unfamiliar with another type of white liquid - and that is found in the Sin & Hippie liberalism of Sex-Ed. Children don't need to know what Sin is. They need to see wholesome Christian heterosexual relationships. This, and with many other reasons is why I wholeheartedly endorse Lady Georgie Campbell for our next Supreme Royal Premier. All Christians should fulfil their duty as Jesus' Servants and vote for this Christian Woman of God."

  • Taylor Swift released a music video of her song, "Shake It Off", with background imagery including pictures of the Former Union of Soviet Nicoleizian Republics, indicating she would advocate a return to the era of Socialism/Communism.

  • Campaign Stop - Taylor Swift Visits Nuwnociluosoaulaunk:

    Taylor Swift arose to the podium, with a bright red Communist Star with a yellow a sickle and hammer displayed on it. And the flag of Nuwnociluosoaulaunk and the flag of the former UNSR (Union of Nicoleizian Socialist Republics, or "West Icholasen"/"Communist Icholasen") behind her. Nuwnociluosoaulaunk was the centre of the UNSR's power and might, and held the largest population centre of Saint Mary which dwarfed the populations of other Nicoleizian Socialist Republics. Taylor waited for the crowd to stop their rapturous applause for her and then began to speak.

    "Ladies and Gentlemen, Comrades and Bourgeoisie Media Scum, I am here today to address the great Republic of Nuwnociluosoaulaunk, a great power and hub of Nicoleizian speakers, and Nicoleizian values of friendship, compassion, and burning members of the bourgeoisie. It is your spirit which prevents to this day. Some might call this small nation "backwards" and "morally void", but from the welcome I have been blessed with today, I know that is not true. The Socialist Party under Ellen Page was too quick to join with the filthy Bourgeoisie Liberal Democratic Socialists. I am here today to represent a new Socialist Party, a Party that will revive the revolution, and drive revolutionary change in Nuwnociluosoaulaunk, and the rest of Icholasen, and the world.

    Today in Icholasen we face a grave threat. European Market Capitalism is encroaching our borders. It has been proven time and time again, that is doesn't work. I will not rest until the likes of our famous Nicoleizian revolutionary, Rosa Luxemburg, can be happy in their graves, and their Communist legacy not lost on us. Remember the circumstances in which the Nicoleizian monarchy was killed. Their power has the potential to become resurgent and the horrible Autocratic rule could return. Imagine Queen Anastasia running our armed forces, or economy. The legacy of Royalty has been terrible for us. And the legacy is still felt everywhere in this nation from when their power went unchecked, unbalanced, and the people were at the bottom of the power pyramid.

    But we have a chance - a chance to reclaim the put out flames of Communist Icholasen. Though the flames are long dead, there are fiery embers, and they have the chance to start a new inferno of pure Socialism across Icholasen and the world. In the next decade, I no doubt will be speaking from the Soviet Republic of Inimicus, on a People's Voyage to make our workers feel intertwined. And, the next month I might head to Pravoslaviya to meet with my brothers, sisters, and Eastern European doppelganger, who is totally fake. But, back to my main point - Socialism is coming. And the Western Capitalist nations can no longer hide from us. We're here. We're going to start a world revolution. And I'm the one to start it off. Thanks for your time, Comrades."

    Taylor stepped down from the podium, and raised her hand in a fist, the crowd followed suit. "Long live the revolution" she shouted in Nicoleizian.

  • Campaign Stop - Kelis in Saint Pierre:

    "Hello Portlanders!" Kelis announced from a stage with a live band behind her. An applause spread around the audience, and the audience was soon engulfed in the sound of rapturous applause. "I am here tonight, to address you - the people of Saint Pierre, but more importantly as people of Portland. For too long, our interests have been disregarded. In the dairy referendum, for example, our wishes were not respected at all. Saint Regina dragged us out of our chances of free-dairy for everyone. We want cream." The crowd erupted in rapturous applause, shouting 'We want cream' multiple times. "Now - ladies, gentlemen, and those who are lactose intolerant, we need to vote in order to get our voices heard, and ultimately break off from the union. It is the only way for us to securely have access to dairy. It is not what I would want to happen, but is the reality of the situation in these Nine Dominions."

    "Furthermore," Kelis continued "we need to protect our interests as a nation. The Dominions of Saint Pierre & Portland are the most resource rich of all the Dominions. We cannot sit idly by whilst they're stolen to fund development elsewhere. We are bustling, busy, and booming, and just because Regina wants to drag us down, doesn't mean we should let them. Let's look at the other party leaders - John Prescott for example wants to 'respect' the result of the Dairy Referendum. Well, here in Portland we don't take kindly to a clearly rigged election. And, after which, our privilege as two Dominions to allow dairy was stolen from us. How is that 'respecting' anyone here in Portland? And Lady Georgie Campbell is flat out anti-Milk. It is rumoured she fed her children wine instead of breast milk. Isn't that just to show how out of touch that mad old lady is. Thanks for you time everyone, and remember, vote for the Portland National Party!"

    Kelis got off the stage to rampant shouts of "We want cream!".

  • Polling Update and Analysis from Stephanie DeVey:

    "Hello, this is Stephanie DeVey with your election update. The current party in the lead, is the National Awakening Party, with 26% of those polled supporting her. No matter what happens, it is likely that an intimate web of coalitions in the new Royal Senate will be required to keep a government afloat. Coming in second, however, is the Liberal Democratic Socialist Party, with leader Hulun Schmocks with exactly a quarter of those surveyed supporting her now. Schmocks is a leader who speaks to the centrists in the Country, and also takes in disaffected Party of June supporters, who are unhappy with the Party of June's stance on the Dairy Referendum, Schmocks of course believing Dairy should be legalised. In third is the Socialist Party under Taylor Swift - she received most support in Nuwnociluosoaulaunk and Portland's two Dominions. The Party of June is 5th - it's former strong and stable image wrecked by the havoc Delphine Cormier's resignation has had on the people in the 9 Dominions. Additionally, John Prescott is seen as a divisive figure, many people are angry that Eilidh Whiteford was not nominated for the role of Supreme Royal Premier, and see the Party of June's high committee as missing a golden opportunity to win another election. The Parti Nationaliste Romanique is in 6th, the Party of June is very strong there, as it is seen as a French Party, and John Prescott's remarks about "More Power to the Dominions" truly resonates with the people in Romain, with much of the de-centralisation happening in the Cormier administration."