23 Feb 2022, 04:30

Istkalen Information Service: Court rules in favor of Reszelport Jezebel-Swift

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Jezebel-Swift in her first public appearance since her arrest

After a month long trial, the trial of Reszelport Jezebel-Swift, otherwise known as Pope Tabitha, has come to a conclusion. Jezebel-Swift was initially arrested for inciting violence after a homily in which, to the sound of electric guitars, she called for the killing of her opponents and those she considered to be "sinners." She was kept in secret and solitary detention for two weeks until her trial finally began, under less than public circumstances, on the 31st of January.

Journalists and the public were not allowed into the trial, but Jezebel-Swift was allowed legal representation, and the trial is generally seen as fair, particularly as it ruled in favor of Jezebel-Swift instead of the state.

Upon examination of the evidence, in particular Jezebel-Swift's wide audience, armed enough and duty-bound to obey her words, but also her nominal status as Pope of the Arian Church, the court concluded that Jezebel-Swift, per her own claims and the history of the Arian Church, had effectively renounced her Istkalenic citizenship for Vatican citizenship, as, by the belief and history of the Church itself, it is the legitimate Catholic church and its Pope is the Bishop of Rome.

However, per Jezebel-Swift's own admission, they found that she remained clearly guilty of her crimes, and was completely without remorse. She was thus found guilty; but her lack of citizenship required deportation.

Jezebel-Swift is thus to be deported to the Vatican City "as soon as possible." Thousands celebrated outside the court chambers the decisions, largely because she was to go and thus that Istkalen would be free of her.

"The [woman] is gone!" screamed many.

Yet her arrest has given her widespread support. She is now widely seen among the Arian community as not a heretic but a martyr whose persecution reveals the truth of her beliefs. She is not merely regarded as the Pope but also as a prophet in her own right by millions.

Jezebel-Swift was temporarily freed before her deportation, although she remained under surveillance. She gave a relatively controlled speech, although she continued most of her most radical opinions, including her rejection of virtually all Arian principles for a self-created theology involving Pelagianism and modalism. Most was, however, dedicated to affirming her position as the one true Pope of the Catholic Church, the one true Bishop of Rome, as well as denouncing Pope Peter II, the current pope, as a "heretic," which many have termed "the pot calling the kettle black."

Jezebel-Swift then sent out a message to her followers, promising them Vatican citizenship if they "followed her in a grand crusade." Over 2000 are believed to have answered the summons, and gathered before the papal palace in the Arian territories, where she spoke to them again of the necessity of "restoring true Christianity" to the Catholic Church. In her "Popemobile," she then led them in a massive procession to the only airport in those territories, privately owned by Jezebel-Swift herself, which includes her private fleet of 50 planes, earned through profits from the uranium mines and banks the Arian Church owned prior to the occupation, in addition to the sale of agricultural products and textiles made through what was almost slave labor. Her so-called 200-strong "Papal Guard" (not, notably, the Swiss Guard, which the Arians and now Jezebel-Swift claim to have been an invention of heretics), also joined.

Carrying hastily made banners, they screamed various slogans calling for the "restoration" of the Catholic Church and the "true Bishop of Rome," as well as for the "wrath of God" to be brought down upon Pope Peter II.

"God, smash the delusion of Carlos Vallejo!" screamed Mikeli Neripas, an important Arian figure, from the forefront of the procession. "Smash it with your iron rod!"

"Strike, strike.... until you have victory, God!" shouted Erkas Tilisek, the head of the Patriotic Front. "In the name of Jesus!"

Onlookers claimed that many, if not all, of those in the procession were carrying automatic firearms, and that they had seen a large procession of trucks behind them carrying a large amount of ammunition, as well as large packages of an unknown material, which has been speculated to be explosives. It is a well known fact that the Pope, in her nominal role as the leader of the autonomous Arian territories, has sole control over armories for the religious police and militia of the area, which, while now much weaker, continue to exist, which include all these materials.

It is also known that the Arian Church has been preparing for a "reconquest" of the Vatican for hundreds of years; it is believed by some that these weapons may have been specifically inteded for the purpose of this reconquest

Hundreds if not thousands were seen emerging from their homes and cheering on the erstwhile crusaders as they marched on their way to Jezebel-Swift's private airport, almost hysterically. Some even walked behind them, some joining and seemingly given weapons, according to neutral onlookers.

Jezebel-Swift again addressed the procession, joined by the leadership of the Patriotic Front, when they reached the airport, telling them that they had to be "brave for God" and that their "holy and ordained mission" would be dangerous, and that many would "become martyrs before God." She then appeared to gibberish for ten minutes, before again exhorting the crowd before her to "follow her," claiming that she was "God's sole representative on Earth...his power now flows through me..." to widespread and hysterical cheering.

She then "conferred Vatican citizenship" on all of those present, before having an aide next to her request permission from the National Directorate for "self-deportation" - in essence, the right for her merely to carry out her deportation by herself, which under certain legal interpretations may be possible. The call was broadcast with the use of some speakers that were found inside the airport, and was repeatedly interrupted with mass outpourings of further hysterical cheering and screaming.

The National Directorate has not yet responded to the request of Jezebel-Swift. Some have called for military action to be taken; but the Republican Defence Forces have insisted that they do not have the authorization to act as of now. In the meantime, however, further convoys of trucks have been seen arriving at the airport, carrying large packages which many believe to be further weapons, ammunition, or explosives, with the excitement of the cfrowd apparently being kept up by regular exhortations from Jezebel-Swift, Tilisek, Neripas, and other figures within the Arian community.

Some went directly to Rikkalek's office to ask for intervention, but he did not appear to be present. It was rumored that he was to be found in a cafe, but no one appears to have investigated there, perhaps out of fear.