MAKE EUROPE GREAT AGAIN (AGAIN)! Trympov for Premier
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ABOUT DRAGAN TRYMPOV
Dragan Trympov is the very definition of the European success story, setting the standards of excellence in his business endeavours, and now in Pravoslaviyan and European politics.
A self-made billionaire, Trympov inherited just a few million Pravoslaviyan dinars and a modest property portfolio from his father, Fridrik Trympov, who had entered the world of business after the fall of Communism in 1989. During the late 1990s and early 2000s, Trympov created an empire of skyscrapers, hotels, casinos, golf courses, steaks, board games, and vodka – and much, much more. In the late 2000s, Trympov – already a byword for business success in Pravoslaviya – became even more of a household name as the host of the Pravoslaviyan edition of phenomenally successful TV show The Apprentice.
Most recently, disgusted at the corruption at the heart of the Pravoslaviyan political system under former Prime Minister 'Retard' Apostol Tsrvenovski, Trympov entered politics as leader of the League Against Corruption. He tore up the political rule book and took his message directly to the people, and in 2016 became Pravoslaviya's Deputy Prime Minister, in coalition with Prime Minister Metodi Pravoslav. During his time in office, Trympov has kept his promises to defend Pravoslaviya's borders against illegal immigration, speak out against fake news, and denounce the crimes of Europe's corrupt globalist elite.
In 2020, Dragan Trympov took his movement Europe-wide. Campaiging to drain the swamp in Europolis, stop the coups and Make Europe Safe Again, and standing up to Communism and globalism, he went from nowhere to over 30% of the vote in just three weeks, against the full weight of the globalist machine. Now, he is continuing his fight to Make Europe Great Again!
MAKE EUROPE GREAT AGAIN: THE MANIFESTO
Click the logo below to find out more about Dragan Trympov's plan to Make Europe Great Again!
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CAMPAIGN LAUNCH
TSETINYE, PRAVOSLAVIYA
The Dragan Trympov Make Europe Great Again theme song plays as Trympov takes the stage
Thanks, folks. Thanks.
Isn’t this election crazy, folks? Isn’t it ridiculous? All these candidates, there’s so many, I don’t even know who half of them are! And they’re all going round doing these speeches and rallies, which, by the way, I invented. Nobody gives me credit for it, and that’s OK, but I was the first to do that, OK? And now everybody does it, and to be honest, I don’t think they’re doing it very well, but that’s fine, they can do that.
So this election, folks, has so many people and so many speeches, and they’re so bad. The more they speak, the more places they go, the crazier it gets, folks. Now, I wasn’t going to run in these elections, OK? It’s not like I don’t have better things to do with my time; I have my business, I have my own country, I have the Make Europe Great Again Foundation, so I have so many things to do. But I’ve been watching the shows, all the shows, and the more I see these people talk, I think what the hell’s going on? Who are these people and why do they want to do all these crazy things?
Therefore, I am officially announcing that Dragan Trympov is standing for the office of Premier Commissioner of the European Union. Because it’s so important, folks, that we don’t let any of these other people in charge of the region.
You know, when Whiteford stood down, I was so glad, I thought, thank God, folks. Thank God. I told you she’d be a disaster and, well, was I right or was I right? Our region still has so much Communism, we’ve got the Emperor of Inimicus being shot out of the sky, we’ve got some real bad things going on in Eastern Haane and Nofoaga, and Whiteford has failed so badly. So the EPA tapped her on the shoulder and they said ‘Whiteford, you’re not going to win, time to go.’ Bye-bye!
So things are as bad as they were four months ago, and now these candidates just want to make everything even worse. The EPA have nominated Angela Merkel – remember her? That was days ago, and she still hasn’t got her papers in! Can you believe that? As of now, Merkel is not on the ballot! Maybe she’s having second thoughts. If you had the EPA, the globalist elites, come and say, you have to be their candidate for Premier, and you have to defend them, would you do it?
But while they’ve got Merkel, in a room, trying to convince her not to drop out, they’ve sent Juncker out there to tell you what they’re going to do to Europe. And oh, boy. This guy came here and said he was going to take your money, and give it to big corporations, big telecom companies, so they can do 5G. With TV aerials, which, folks, is not going to work, OK? You can’t do 5G with TV aerials.
But it’s OK! It’s fine, folks, because we’ll get some of the money back. Some. Not as an investment; he wants to get the money back in taxes. Isn’t that ridiculous? It’s a gift! He’s literally going to gift your money to big telecom companies, and there’s no return except in tax revenues. I’m a businessman, OK, and that is the single worst deal of all time; not for Juncker, because if he wins, that’s OK, you don’t get to vote him out in four months’ time because he can’t run. It’s the worst deal ever for you. The ordinary, forgotten people of Europe, and her nations, getting screwed by globalist politicians and their big corporate friends. That’s the EPA, people. They’re in a big globalist alliance against you.
So then I hear about the ELDR, and their candidate for Premier is a woman called Maria Kerstin, OK? She’s supposed to be 36, she looks about 50, but that’s OK, I’m not going to criticise her for that. And so far she’s fallen for a fake meme, can you believe that? If you told Kerstin that they’d taken ‘gullible’ out of the dictionary, she’d go running up the stairs, get the dictionary off the bookshelf, flick, flick, flick. And she’d find it in there and she’d say, well, folks, looks like we need to update our dictionary. It’s true!
And by the way, when she’s going round doing these speeches, she keeps saying ‘oh, I’m not completely ELDR, I don’t always agree with the ELDR, I think the ELDR is wrong on this,’ and you think, well, what do you agree with the ELDR on? She’s only in the ELDR to say she doesn’t like it, and you know what, I don’t like the ELDR either, so maybe that’s something we can agree on.
But her proposal to cut the budget contributions of poorer countries – isn’t that so crazy? She wants the richer countries – DU, Inquista, Angleter – to pay more. But no, she says they’re not going to pay more. So I’m like, how does that work? Maybe she wants the EU to run out of money, or maybe she’s lying, I don’t know.
But she wants to make the richer countries pay more, relatively speaking, at least; and those tend to be the bigger countries, and to really smack them down she wants to make sure they don’t get proportional, fair representation in the Council. That’s so wrong and it’s going to destroy Europe, folks. You pay more, but you don’t get more say. Those countries are already getting screwed, and this Kerstin wants to screw them so much more, it’s ridiculous.
And then there’s Winston! That guy is the single biggest snake in European politics, OK? He was all ‘oh, I love Dragan, I love Trympov’, because he wanted me to drop out and endorse him, OK? And then he turned round and said ‘oh, let’s have a federal Europe, isn’t Trympov bad’. Winston is such a mess, it’s laughable. And now he wants to tell all your schools what to teach, he wants to put your money into crazy projects that’ll never work, like this giant tube thing, and all these satellites in space, with lasers.
Folks, the EPA want to take your money and give it to their globalist friends; but the ELDR want to take your money, play with it themselves, and of course, give it to migrants, because these people are ‘Migrants and Minorities First’. They don’t care about ordinary people, folks. They don’t care about you. And the radical left candidates – well, folks, you don’t need me to tell you they want to take your money too.
If we’re going to Make Europe Great Again, then we need to stop taking people’s money. People are losing enough money, it needs to stop. I promise I will not increase the EU budget if I am Premier Commissioner. No more crazy spending projects, OK?
There’s only two other candidates who get this, folks. Many people have been asking me, Dragan, what do you think about Cocx? And I hear what he says about fiscal responsibility, and it’s great, but I haven’t heard much about Cocx. Some of what he’s been saying, I like, but I haven’t seen enough of Cocx. I can’t trust him to stand up and not flip-flop, OK? And folks, nobody with that name is getting elected – it’s so sad, but he has to change it if he wants to win!
The other candidate, of course, is the great John Oliver. That man, OK, he knows how to rattle the globalist elite in this region. He’s not afraid to say what he thinks; I hear he’s being a little more serious in his tone right now, and I think that’s good, he knows we need to unite this region. But he’s a good guy, and he’s going to work with me to Make Europe Great Again, and he’s going to keep calling out what’s wrong with our region, and that’s great, and I hope you all vote for him for Internal Affairs.
The problems our region has are basically the same it had four months ago, because our current globalist Commission has done such a terrible job. So I’m not going to go round telling you what you already know. Not this time. Because we still need common sense against coups and Communism. We still need to stop the crazy spending projects. We still need to put the member states first, and let them put their citizens first.
Four months ago we went from nowhere to 30% of the vote, in a rigged system, in the space of a few weeks. We hit the globalists so hard, they didn’t know what was going on. This time we’re going to knock them out, OK? We are going to knock globalism out, and we will Make Europe Great Again! Thanks, folks.
