10 Jul 2020, 22:35

Confederation Council passes orders in attempt to reduce partisan divides; Vitra to become the new face of the Haanean furniture industry

With partisan divides over the most innocuous of issues now amounting to extreme threats of violence, many have become worried over the integrity of the People's Confederation. This has become especially so since the events of last night, during which effigies of a number of politicians were burned in bizarre rituals which involved the consumption of alcohol and the chanting of lewd rhymes.

Many experts have begun to suspect capitalist agitators as having caused this events; part of this was confirmed with the discovery of massive advertising campaigns as well as a network which linked many individuals that had risen to fame as a result of their fiery rhetoric in the non-binding deliberative assemblies used by the Haanean government to consult the people.

The Confederation Council has taken action to stop these activities, ensuring a greater equality within the assemblies and banning political advertising entirely.

No real connection to capitalist states, however, has been found, although such a thing remains a possibility.

"It is very likely; in fact, it is the only possibility," said Eva van der Bijl, the former leader of the United Communist Party who fell from power after making a bizarre speech that insulted a number of politicians across Europe.

Others strongly disagree:

"There is nothing to be gained from us. They have already discredited us by citing our economy. Everyone here, of course, knows that what they say is false; but the damage outside has already been done. In my opinion, it is a politician here," said a woman walking to her home in Kiel.

In other news, the Vitra brand has been resurrected in an attempt to increase the influence of Eastern Haane in the international market. The country, once home to a number of influential modernist industrial designers, has fallen into obscurity throughout Europe. Its products are generally only distributed within itself, as a part of the 'furniture allowance' due to all citizens as well as through regular, albeit highly subsidized, retail.

However, Vitra, formed of both the Syndicate of Engineers and the Syndicate of Importers and Exporters, will now export Haanean products, selling high quality, sturdy, modernist furniture to the rest of the world. Initial prices have already been released; however, many have become angry at them:

"It is scandalous. We get the furniture for very cheap, and they...they have to pay three hundred dollars for a small clock! Not to mention the one-thousand dollar office chair! This is capitalism, pure and simple!" shouted a man at a protest in Kolding.