(Secular) Christmas in the North
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Cécile Laucre was pacing her office. A demilitarised zone had built up between the two Icholasens. The economic situation was not looking good and the Nicoleizian people yearned to be one again. Was she strong enough to keep a lid on all the discontent in her fiefdom?As a female tyrant, she put a certain feminine swing on things. And as such, she decided a cocktail soirée was the best way sure up international support.
Enter PUTINA.
‘You sent for me ma’am.’ The big boobed head of the Nicova (secret police) said.
‘Yes, Putina, we need to discuss the security arrangements for when the international community arrives at our cocktail soirée.’
‘Yes ma’am. I’ve arrested several journalists just to be sure.’
‘Thank you loyal Putina. I shall start designing the cocktail menu.’
Several days letter, at the Palace of the Republic, Putina surveyed where the party would take place. As she was in charge of the festivities and wanted to seem inconspicuous, she was also dressed in a beautiful dress. Which showed her two big melons.
The time for the non denominational secular winter holiday party had begun. The cocktail menu was as follows:
UNSR Mule: vodka, ginger beer, lime juice, mint
White Nicoleizian (why it gotta be white): vodka, coffee liqueur, cream
Long Island (the island in question being Icholasen) iced tea: vodka, tequila, triple sec, gin, cola
-
The political leadership has long for a long time been disappointed with the developments on the island of Icholasen. In particular with the split of the state as allowed by Cécile Laucre.
"I just don't get it. I mean, if the people select you as the leader of their nation, how could you sacrifice it's unity. For personal gain?" Albína Reiserová asked, looking out of the window of her seat.
"Naturally, the Champion of Mokosh could not understand such wickedness and the immoral ambitions of little people. You who have sacrificed all the comfort for the unity of the nation, who has casted vice into darkness, saved the people and the state and now leads the spiritual revival, could not possibly understand those who only seek to maintain power and steal it from the people." the weak voice of Slavomír declared. The aging priest sat directly next to the Czechoslavonic President, a position previously afforded only to Karel Šín, Zuzana Saková or Lubomír Mejzlík. But nowadays, wherever any of them went the Rodnovery priest has always occupied this spot.
"Long live Comrade President!" Zuzana Saková immediately proclaimed loudly and the airplane soon filled with the same proclamations by Jasmína Dlouhá, Viktor Hladík, Pavel Dohnal and Sofie Čikarová. Only one person did not shout praises to the Head of State, a voice which has just loudly snored a voice belonging to Karel Šín.
"Comrade Minister, you have some saliva on your suit." Jasmína proclaimed, kicking Šín's black shoe slightly.
The former actor immediately straighten up and fixed his sun glasses, his breath smelled of mix of alcohol and garlic as he panted and wiped the sweat of his forehead. His head was ringing and his stomach was turning, "Yes, hmmm... I agree with what Albína said." Karel responded quickly with his usual question to being waken up during a meeting. But just like before it seemed to satisfy the president who just smiled at him and returned her eyes to the window.
"Holiday mood already in place in the Ministry of Culture?" Čikarová, the only well known figure in the Socialist Republican Party that has remained atheist after Reiserová's conversion to Rodnovery, due to the fact that she was not ethnically Slavic.
"No." Šín responded, crossing his arms over his chest and yawning, "I have just been working hard yesterday."
The plane has finally landed in a small private airport close to the capital city and the, quite large Czech delegation has set their foot on land to be greeted by forces of the Nicova.
-
For a time, it was the official stance of the Inquistan Orthodox Church to vehemently deny even the faintest possible existence of the UNSR. While Archbishop Mikaela Kligenberg has no ideological qualms allying herself with communists or socialists, as seen with her personal and diplomatic closeness to the Czechoslavonic President, her undying loyalty to one of her best friends, Queen Anastasia, led her to accept Firoux's radical stance of only recognizing the Nicoleizian government in exile. Despite this, the Archbishop had also pushed for a reconciliation of the various Nicoleizian governments, even hoping to bring some sort of unity agreement between socialist and democratic forces with the help of President Reiserová.
However, things have drastically changed over the last while. The officially non-existent UNSR split, with the north remaining as an increasingly more authoritarian UNSR, while the south emerged as a newfound democratic republic. While the Nicoleizian government in exile never returned to power, the south became the official beacon of Nicoleizian democracy. While the country split, both sides have officially recognized each other, effectively bringing legitimacy to both the UNSR and the newfound republic in the south.
Inquista now recognizes both Icholasens, and the Archbishop even more enthusiastically supports a reunification of the two countries under one banner. In her first official visit to the UNSR, the Archbishop is looking to normalize relations between Inquista and the UNSR, and to build goodwill to support reunification efforts.
The Archbishop's plane was now enroute to the UNSR, where she was eager to attend the Christmas soirée. As Christmas was by far the most dominant social, cultural and religious celebration in Inquista, the Archbishop didn't even think twice of why a communist state would be celebrating the festive occasion.
"Everyone loves Christmas, right? I mean, it's lovely time of year with the best atmosphere. The movies are great... especially those Hallmark ones! They're are all so unique, with those unpredictable endings that always get me, like who would of thought the city girl would go back to her small town and get back with her high school fling!? So cute!" Mikaela sighed sweetly as she turned to Captain Jimin, who was sitting beside her in the co-pilot seat of the cockpit.
The Archbishop had gotten bored of always sitting as a passenger in her private jet, and had started learning how to fly herself under the supervision of her beloved private pilot. 627 hours logged into Flight Simulator on Steam had really begun to pay dividends for the Archbishop, whose Twitch livestreams of her Flight Simulator let's plays even led to Beyonce completely copying her entire gaming fit, including the pink headset THAT SHE WORE FIRST (as stated by Mikaela's cease and desist letter to Jay-Z).
"You know that Bina has been in a few films like that? I've watched all of her movies, they're SO good. Ugh, it's no wonder her people love her, she is T-A-L-E-N-T-E-D", the Archbishop emphasized enthusiastically. "And the music! So good! My entire Spotify Wrapped is all Christmas music, and that's because I can't help but to begin listening to it starting in July. I feel so embarrassed because I never share my Wrapped with anybody, they don't get it."
The Archbishop turned to Captain Jimin and let go of the plane's control to continue her point, but the captain quickly freaked out and signaled to her to pay attention to her mission at hand.
Mikaela tried her best to make the descent to the airport, and after a rocky and shaky landing, managed to complete her first complete voyage as the primary pilot of her private jet.
"Nailed it, right?" Mikaela asked calmly while Captain Jimin flinched at her suggestion. "What? I asked calmly?" Mikaela asked calmly.
The Archbishop then pulled out hand mirror from a nearby cubby and examined herself as she repositioned her pastel pink santa hat. "I hope I came dressed properly for the occasion. It's Christmas themed, I think, or something. I don't know. The instructions weren't clear at all. I came dressed in costume just in case."
The Archbishop then got up and walked to a mirror that had been installed the plane's small lounge and began to admire herself.
"So cute!"
The Archbishop then departed from the plane and made her way to her her specially requested pink limousine. As she approached the pink limousine, a very large crowd of Nicoleizians had gathered to catch a glimpse of the Archbishop as she made her first visit to the UNSR. "Ich bin ein Icholasener!" Mikaela announced, with her hand raised, to the crowd before stepping into her limousine which took her to the soiree.
Upon arriving at the soiree, the Archbishop performed her usual ritual of beelining straight to getting some drinks. "I'll have a White Nicoleizian, please! As they say, once you go White, well... I don't know what they say actually. Two shots, though, please?"
