An Orthodox Approach to Diplomacy
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Bishop Secretary Finsch shrugged. "I have it on good authority that all prisoners we managed to capture are now, apparently, in a better place."
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Bernie Sanders took the mic. "We are happy to take up that offer as long as East Moreland is an independent state controlled by those same communist rebels. Icholasen does not hold any hostages at this point as our campaign was just an air campaign against Inquistah."
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Nigel responds to Sanders immediately.
Mr. Farage: "I'm sorry, but E. Moreland will remain our reich controlled by the legitimate government, but we still welcome communists in our nation as long as they do not begin violence or start uprisings. They are welcome to the government to be elected, the URR is a free and democratic populace that elects its officials." -
"I have good word from Taoiseach Donaghue in Ireland that we could perhaps resettle some people who require asylum in Ireland," Foreign Minister Parly said to the assembled.
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"Gosh, for the amount of money talk in this room you would think we were in a Llanowar stock room," muttered Kristian.
"There seems to be the wish to tie the redevelopment of E. Moreland with pretty much everything else on the table. Here is what I propose, an International Committee on the Resettlement on Reitzmag Refugees to be either held in Vayinaod or Europolis. Any claims for refugees will be administratively processed here while the refugee remains as a neutral campsite outside of E. Moreland. Any communists captured by Reitzmag will be considered political asylum claimants unless a specific heinous crime is brought against an individual to be verified by this committee. It will be staffed by one Inquistan, one Reitzman, one Nicoleizian, one Gaulois chaired by a Vayinaodic judge who will service to break ties. Vayinaod will offer to pay the administrative fees of this committee for the first three years. This committee will also investigate to ensure no Prisoners of Wars are actually present.
Now to just get rid of the money question, I propose this. The East Moreland Redevelopment and Investment Trust be established. It will be managed by a neutral party to be stationed here in Nyetthem. It will work to provide loans, investments, and other capital offerings to people and businesses in E. Moreland. Each party at this conference will commit to providing 250 million dollars annually over the next two years. There will be a return on investment. The Government of Reitzmag and E. Moreland may apply for these loans and investments same as the civilian populace.
In return E. Moreland will be granted an autonomous status within Reitzmag to take a handle on its own politics more and have more control over its reconstruction. This autonomous status will be ensured by Vayinaodic observers in its democratic processes for the next five years. Reitzmag will also offer to pay 25% of the total cost of Inquistan operations that took place before the bombing of E. Moreland. Inquista will not be held legally liable for damages caused in civil or criminal courts, and admits no wrong doing as well.
There will also be a general withdrawal of all military forces to begin in the next twenty-four hours to be completed in one weeks time. Any force that stays past this point must compensate Reitzmag.
Did I miss anything or anyone have any problems with this?"
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Adm. Anderson speaks up to add something.
Adm. Anderson: "I also would like to have Icholasen replace the destroyed RNS Archangel Gabriel after an SU-57 fighter-bomber dropped missiles above the said patrol vessel." -
Bernie said "we do not do 'investments'. If we were to put any money into this destroyed region, that, may I remind you, was not destroyed by us, we would demand the money was given to a communist government. Only communists can do what is best for the people -- not business owners, shareholders or... billionaihs!"
Becky Short-Hailey said "that ship was destroyed by a rogue pilot and we take no responsibility for that loss. We will not provide anything, any money any weapons to a non-communist government."
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Nigel exclaims immediately.
Mr. Farage: "Mr Sanders, the money will not go to the government but to the restoration of the entire Reich of E. Moreland, also investigation had already shown that the plane bears the roundel of the Nicolezian Air Force. This proves that there's no more excuse for you to replace our ship." -
"We don't care that it was a Nicoleizian plane, it was not, according to us, a sane Nicoleizian pilot. Under no circumstances will we replace the ship." Becky Short-Hailey replied.
"We also will not supply any money to capitalist regimes as we cannot trust that this money will go to the people. It will, in all likelihood, go to the billionaihs who have already profited enough off this war." Bernie added.
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"Let me quickly interject to say that the European Council has banned any arms deals with the communists controlling the island of Icholasen. Which is why they would instead provide support to the community of E. Moreland that their air fighting with Inquista is now impacting with down jets and further death. Obviously this support would be in the most effective way possible for E. Moreland that is with monetary means.
The Autonomous government of E. Moreland would remain loyal to its crown and must democratically figure out its government. If that leads to a communist democratic government that is the way it will be. The people have a choice.
The Fund again will be managed by a neutral party who will ensure that it is used for the most humanitarian means possible for common citizens most impacted by this conflict. "
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Adm. Anderson: "I would also address that Inquista should not be payed since they invaded us helplessly. We consider their actions as invasion since they weren't permitted to do so."
Mr. Farage; "I also would like to inform everyone that E. Moreland does not require Autonomous status since all reichs are lead by their respective governors which handles its own politics but still follows the laws from the national parliament."
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"That is why the Reitzmag compensation is only passed during the initial point of the Inquistan entrance when they were invited by the Reitzmag government to enter and take control of their air space.
Your nation is officially described as a unitary state in the European Factbook. E. Moreland achieving an autonomous status may help alleivate the apparent political and economic situation it is currently in and provide to the parties here a form of assurance."
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"Inquista has established a particularly rigid and precise refugee scheme under the tenure of our current Archbishop. This refugee scheme is very generous and will allow for any Inquistan Orthodox refugee to resettle in Inquista. Thus, all displaced Inquistan Orthodox persons in Reitzmag may apply for refugee status in Inquista. With that said, we will not accept any other sort of refugees. For that reason, the rest of you can agree to some sort of international committee on the matter. That's fine with Inquista, but we won't be involved in it.
"Similarly, you may also set up any sort of international fund to redevelop E. Moreland as you like. That's completely fine. However, Inquista won't be part of it either. If Inquistans are to provide loans, investments and other capital to businesses in E. Moreland, then we shall develop our own fund for that cause on our terms. Air Marshal Copala has devised a reconstruction package to rebuild the economy of E. Moreland, which has been dubbed the 'Air Marshal Plan'. We have been expecting the Air Marshal to share the terms of the reconstruction package. However, we have not heard from her in some time, so you will have to sit tight and wait.
"I agree with the latter terms. Reitzmag should reimburse at least 25% of the total cost of the Inquistan operations. I also agree that Inquista will not be liable for any damages which may have been caused in uprooting the communists."
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Nigel reads the document sent by HM George I.
Mr. Farage: "I also like to address that HM George I asks that visa-free travel be implemeted between all countries involved in the situation for at least 1 month." -
"With all due respect, Kristian, Icholasen doesn't care if capitalists were affected by the war and if they suffer or have suffered it's karma." Becky Short-Hailey said. "We will not give anyone a penny if they're not - say it with me folks - communist. Also, Reitzmag has banned travel between itself and Icholasen so it is not us causing a barrier for free movement. Icholasen's position on refugees is that it will welcome literally anyone from any country if they pledge allegiance to Chairman Jirluchuz and the flag under which we in Icholasen live and die."
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"Absolutely not. Inquista has long already instituted visa-free travel with Icholasen, but that agreement has now been suspended in light of the communist takeover. We will not restore visa-free travel to Nicoleiziains until their legitimate government has been returned to power. We certainly also won't be extending visa-free travel to Reitzmen during this current time. That is something we can consider once we have been paid war reparations."
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"If this committee was to basically act as a centralization of the refugee status of people from Reitzmag and not force refugees on countries who do not wish specific groups would that be more acceptable to Inquista. If all Inquista wants to take is Inquistan Orthodox refugees that is alright, but for the purposes of clarify, accountability, and ease between all the interested parties here this committee would only work to facilitate the standards set forth by the partner nations. Inquista won't be forced to take Catholics or communists. Think about it the process for checking and initially approving various refugees would be paid by someone else.
I should remind that the compensation from Reitzmag to Inquista is only for the period of time before the bombing of E. Moreland.
What if this fund was made partly-federalised in a way. Inquistan money sent to the fund could have some if not all of the terms it wishes attached and could more easily track where and how it is spent. It would be just be administered by a neutral head here in Nyetthem to no tax charge from Vayinaod or in Reitzmag on any gains. Each nation could see its cell of money being administered. Unfortunately the Air Marshal is not here, but I can assure that her trademark plan could still be implemented under this fund.
Visa free travel is far away from the conversation we are having right now, and can be a matter for a time much further in the future.
Ma'am the truth of the matter is that you communists got involved in a situation post fact of its communist origin. The point of which you joined there were no communist. Academically you and your forces were taking part in imperialistic moves, so lets not split hairs here. Pleding allegiance to one specific person seems rather bourgeoisie if you ask me. Who knows, if you send more money than probably communist support would rise in a legal and democratic moanner as they wish.
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"Capitalists looking out for each other - I see how it is." Becky Short-Hailey said. "And Jordyn, bruv, you wanna see the legitimate government of Icholasen - it's us mate. Take a long hard look and get used to it. We don't even want your open borders anyway. Inquista is far to small and far too rich for its own good.
As for the accusation that we got involved after the communists died off, that is not true. Before the coup in Icholasen, I and others from the Nicoleizian Dominion of Nuwnociluosoaulaunk aided the communists. Our government in Nuwnociluosoaulaunk is the legitimate and democratically elected predecessor to the current government and be in no doubt, we have been working tirelessly to aid the communists in Reitzmag for a very long time.
In addition, Chairman Jirluchuz (praise be upon him) is the father of our nation, the embodiment of the proletariat. I find it offensive that you should call him out and any more slander against Chairman Jirluchuz (praise be upon him), myself and Bernard here will leave."
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Mr. Farage stands up and bangs his shoe on the table while the Communist Nicolezian Diplomat speaks.
Mr. Farage: "Now we're talking, you are a tyrrant! You are supporting such violent actions despite their leader actually not supporting such thing. Come to think on how many innocent lives were wasted because of the violence you supported. And now, you don't want to pay for repairing a place you turned into wasteland by supporting such acts of chaos. This is ridiculous and unforgivable! You shall suffer the consequences of what you've done!
You also have to replace the patrol vessel with at least equal level of technology. AWACS patrolling the area were present and they reported this immediately. The pilot was identified as Communist Taylor Swift and is a pro-communist Nicolezian. And of course, who would even tend to steal a stealth equipped fighter-bomber. You should have greatly protected such high-tech equipment from "rogue pilots" that you described to have piloted the said aircraft when RNS Archangel Gabriel was destroyed. And who could load such aircraft with those number of missiles by herself?
Friends, this is a very logical situation. And this may easily be solved by accepting that you owe a lot from the URR because of what you've done. Inquista shall also pay since they were those who fought against Communist Icholasen. And that the battle did not involve any equipment of the Grand Royal Armed Forces to attack or retaliate."
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"Sir, you will respect all delegates here and listen to what they say. If you make another action like that we will convene a recess and you will be suspended from attending any further proceedings.
Look, I have offered serious concrete proposals. In compromise no one is ever satisfied, but through compromise we can work to ensure a far better outcome than what was previously expected. You all want different things, but there is no way to to accommodate all of them. There is the fair and just proposal I put forth which allows for us to lay a frame work for more potential to accommodate further grievances. "
