April 21st, 2021
Article by: Florentine Agnell

ANGLEXIT CAMPAIGNERS CALL FOR NEW 'SUPER UNION'

Drake Bell, co-chair of Yes Angleter Can

Angleter could leave the European Union and form a new 'Super Union' with a number of other leading European countries to 'save Europe', according to pro-Anglexit group Yes Angleter Can.

At a campaign stop in Bashan, the group's co-chair, Drake Bell, said that Angleter was not the only country that was dissatisfied with the current situation in Europolis. "It's not just us, there's a lot of countries that put a lot more into Europe than they're getting out. The money's being sucked out of these big countries, and it's not going anywhere. Young people don't care about Europolis any more because you have a lot of poor quality laws, poor quality debate, and councillors being murdered all the time."

The musician was responding to an assertion, made earlier this week by pro-EU campaigner Peter Montfort, that Anglexit would involve 'playing a dangerous game' that could 'destroy Europe'. According to Bell, "we're not going to destroy Europe, we're going to save Europe at this critical moment. Something has to be done; but whenever there's a change, there are always people who oppose it."

Bell continued with an alternative vision of Europe. "If we vote for Anglexit, we can create a new union, a Super Union, with the best countries from around Europe, working together in a way that provides significantly greater economic growth, respects sovereignty; actually gives something to the nation-states and the people, rather than demanding more and more. I can think of, like, 12 countries that'd be interested in that right off the bat."

Yes Angleter Can has since clarified that Bell was stating his own hypothetical opinions, rather than the group's or the Government's official policy. However, his remarks have sparked a heated debate about what direction a post-Anglexit Angleter could take.

Peter Montfort called the idea "an immoral cash grab by the biggest, richest countries" which would "never happen." He continued: "if you want to leave a union to save money, why would you create a new union that costs a little less money; you'd just go all the way, go it alone. And nobody else would join the wildcat union anyway." Twitter personality Tim Alban agreed, saying that the Anglexit campaign's real philosophy was "just leave everyone, believe only one, if you don't like anyone, live alone." Another user suggested that the idea was so unlikely that if it actually happened, then Bell's magnum opus I Found A Way would be an appropriate anthem for the union.

However, Anglexit campaigners took the idea more seriously. Twitter user @PROUDRIHGTWING lauded the idea as "THE FUTURE" and suggested the entire EU except for Istkalen should leave to form the new 'Super Union'. Istkalen recently declared war on Angleter and all other EU member states, only to surrender a matter of hours later, giving Angleter its first completed military victory since joining the EU in 2008. Mary d'Ivry, meanwhile, suggested that Drake Bell's proposal had some merit, but cautioned that "it's going to take some time to realign the region". Robert Kilroy-Silk, meanwhile, said "no more unions" and argued that the only country Angleter needed to co-operate with was itself.

Recent turmoil in Europe has led to a fillip for the Anglexit campaign, which is now expected to poll between 59% and 62% in a referendum. Chaotic scenes in Europolis, the deaths of more European councillors, the situation in Istkalen, and the decision to empower the European Commission to co-ordinate sanctions against member states, have all been seized on by Yes Angleter Can and the governing Citizen Alliance. However, pro-EU campaigners have pointed to the recent resolution of the Caspian crisis, and the muted response to the Neo-Venetia operation, as evidence of EU diplomacy working productively and in Angleter's favour.

March 23rd, 2021
Article by: Sophie Hirst

ANGLETER A SAFE HARBOUR FOR REITZMIC TRADE, INSISTS GOVERNMENT

Trade minister Eleanor Robertson predicts an influx of Copala City-related trade to Angleter

The Government expects that Angleter's trading relationship with Reitzmag will be unaffected by the turbulence surrounding Copala City and the Caspian Sea, according to a senior minister.

Eleanor Robertson, Minister for International Trade, told a seminar with leading import-export businesses that Angleter's treaty with Reitzmag remains in force, and does not mention Copala City at all, meaning that Angleteric trade and investment in the country will withstand its current diplomatic issues.

For months, Reitzmag has been embroiled in a dispute with its neighbours over artificial islands that it unilaterally constructed in the Caspian Sea, which recently escalated as Reitzmag's increasingly impatient neighbours imposed sanctions on the country. The Reitzmic parliament has also approved the country's unilateral withdrawal from the Treaty of Buckingham, which leased the refugee hub of Copala City to the exiled government of Icholasen, and where a growing independence movement has caused concern in Reitzmag.

Reitzmic authorities have now revoked the lease, abolishing Copala City's autonomous separatist-run government, and have said they will review the city's autonomous legal and regulatory environment in a matter of months, while retaining border checks between the city and Reitzmag proper indefinitely. The news is viewed by investors as likely to accelerate the stampede of business away from the city. IKEA and FKEM have announced that their plans to invest in the city have been cancelled, while FremetiaBank has started winding down its Copalan subsidiary and merging it into FremetiaBank-Angleter.

Speaking at an Institute for Commerce panel event this morning, Ms Robertson said Angleteric business could benefit from these developments. "If you look at the world stage, Angleter, really, is the safest harbour for people looking to invest in Reitzmag, to do business in Reitzmag. We made a conscious decision to avoid the Copala City project and we dealt directly with the Reitzmic government, so our investments are more secure; and that means we've got a strong, secure presence there that really helps yield more trade, more investment. So what I'd say to businesses with a presence in Copala City, who perhaps used that as a route into the Reitzmic market; I'd say you should be looking at Angleter right now, because we have an 'in' that a lot of other countries don't."

Ms Robertson also rejected the idea that the current diplomatic situation would harm Angleteric investments in Reitzmag. "I get asked two opposing things quite a lot. Are we going to sanction Reitzmag, and are we going to go to war to defend them; and really the answer is no to both. We have the treaty, and we won't change that. We understand what United Duchies, North Diessen, and Pravoslaviya are doing; but that's for them to do, not us, and we just hope there'll be a solution to that dispute very soon. And the treaty obliges us to defend Reitzmag, but what people have to understand is there's very little prospect of anybody invading Reitzmag over either of these issues."

However, the Trade Minister did acknowledge that supply chain issues were being caused by the Caspian countries' sanctions against Reitzmag. "Absolutely, that hurts our trade, and I've spoken to several businesses who've had problems in that regard. If you can't go through the canal, or North Diessen, or Pravoslaviya even, then that limits your options for how you do trade with Reitzmag. People keep asking me, 'can we use the DK route', and really that's a military logistical network to start with; it's not a normal, reliable, civilian route, and our top priorities there are military priorities, and then natural resources, so coal, and so on. We try to do what we can, but we do accept it's very limited and it's perhaps not quite what people really want. So our understanding is a lot of that trade is still going on, through various routes, but it's more expensive, more circuitous, and it's becoming more difficult to pass those price rises on in Reitzmag while keeping that trade route profitable. We've obviously encouraged people not to pass on these extra costs to Angleteric consumers, but again, that's becoming more difficult. So I really want to reiterate that we're very strongly behind a peaceful resolution to this."

Also on the panel was former Foreign Minister Vitus Duryzatehende, now a backbench Democrat MP, who argued that Ms Robertson was painting an overly optimistic picture. "You've just been saying at great length how great it all is, and then you say, actually you can't really get through to Reitzmag because of the sanctions, you've got to go all round the Wrekin. It can't be both, Eleanor, you know that."

Ms Robertson rejected Mr Duryzatehende's comments: "No, look, I'm not saying now is the perfect time to invest in Reitzmag. I'm saying it's a good time for people who do already, especially via Copala City, to take a look at doing that through Angleter. Because yes, investing in Reitzmag now is bad for everybody, pretty much; but the strongest international presence there, the one least likely to be disrupted any further, the one with the local know-how? That's Angleter, and I have to say, I think everyone here gets that, and it's a shame that you don't."

The Trade Minister refused to be drawn, however, on reports of a military buildup near the border with the separatist Communist regime in Neo-Venetia. "We've made sure that border is well-defended since the coup in Neo-Venetia and going back further. We do routine exercises there, and we'll take further action if and when it's appropriate," she said, adding, "I wouldn't read into anything as a reliable indicator of what might happen next."

December 22nd, 2021
Article by: Sophie Hirst

OVER BY CHRISTMAS? BREAKTHROUGH IN DK NEGOTIATIONS

Kaasian regime representatives leave peace talks in Tsetinye, Pravoslaviya

Negotiations to end the Dromund Kaas War have intensified following reports from Angleteric officials that a 'breakthrough' allowing Angleteric troops to withdraw from the decade-long conflict are 'in sight'.

The talks, which were briefly interrupted by an immigration raid by Pravoslaviyan authorities, are now continuing on a 24/7 basis, as both camps are reportedly optimistic about an agreement being reached by the end of the year. Prime Minister Emryc Isla's target of an agreement and withdrawal by Christmas are believed to be slipping out of sight, but the Angleteric camp is hopeful that they'll only miss that goal by a few days.

Sithian regime officials are believed to be agreeing to a range of commitments in exchange for a withdrawal by Angleteric, Duxburian, and other 'Coalition of the Willing' forces that have been fighting to topple the regime since 2011, when a series of belligerent diplomatic actions by then-Grand Moff Wilhuff Tarkin provoked a pre-emptive military response from the region's leading military powers. Since then, however, Dromund Kaas' mountainous terrain has made ultimate victory elusive for the regional coalition, and allowed the denuded regime to dig in around its capital, Kaas City.

Angleteric officials are pushing for the regime to agree to a degree of respect for basic human rights, effective border control in order to prevent a wave of mass immigration to Angleter and other European countries, the disavowal of terrorist activity, and a commitment against the kind of rearmament and regional aggression that led to the start of the war in 2011. While Sithian regime negotiators have held firm on a number of points, it is believed that the devastating effects of the war, including the Duxburian EMP attack at the start of the war, will render many of these points of contention moot, as the regime will lack the capability, let alone the will, to threaten any of its neighbours, let alone the rest of Europe, for the medium term.

Prime Minister Emryc Isla is on borrowed time to conclude both these negotiations and secure Angleter's victory in the Second Neo-Venetia War, where troops are expected to launch an operation into the remaining Communist bases in the coming days. The Prime Minister secured both confidence and supply and a six-month delay to elections on the grounds that an end to both of these conflicts was near, although his commanding lead in the polls was doubtless another factor, and he knows he has weeks before he has to face the public having either succeeded or failed in keeping his core promises.

The remaining military presence is reported to be well-planned for a hasty exit from Dromund Kaas, with some divisions expecting redeployment to Neo-Venetia. No major operations on the Kaasian front have been made for several months, and many troops and much more equipment has already been removed in anticipation of either an agreement or a long-term cooling of military activities in the country. It is believed that a complete withdrawal could follow days after an agreement being signed.

Robert Rice, leader of the Democratic Party, whose government invaded Dromund Kaas in the first place, is an almost lone voice against the negotiations in New Birmingham. He has denounced Emryc Isla for "negotiating with the 9/9 terrorists," and for "selling out our troops and civilian victims in order to meet a manifesto commitment he couldn't achieve on the battlefield," and has predicted that "within 48 hours of this grubby deal going through, the Sithian regime will be back to the oppressive force it was in 2011, and every force for evil in Europe will have its eyes on New Birmingham."

However, after ten years of war, his claims have fallen on largely deaf ears, with the Prime Minister quipping in recent days that "if Robert Rice wants to fight the DK War himself, he's welcome to buy a gun, charter a jet, and do it himself - I won't stop him." According to polling, around 70% of Angleterics would welcome a negotiated withdrawal from Dromund Kaas; and only 35% would support a form of asylum for Kaasians who oppose the Sithian regime or collaborated with coalition forces during the conflict.

Peter Montfort, former Chairman of EuroVoice, European Councillor, and European Commissioner, and recently-appointed Chairman of the Angleter for Europe campaign, had put a lot of time and effort into his costume, choosing to go as what he considered a truly terrifying concept.

It was something of a relief for Peter to be back in Europolis. The first few days of the campaign hadn't been great. The narrative that he was only fighting to save Angleter's EU membership because it had given him a succession of well-paid jobs over several years was proving difficult to fight, not least since it was mostly true.

In fact, he felt like giving a little abuse back for once. Clocking one attendee in a hyper-realistic costume, he shouted "OI, SIMON BRIDGES! WANKER!" as he headed towards the bar.

At the bar, Peter started talking to Tobias Johnson Farage. "Good job that wasn't actually Bridges, huh?"

@Montenbourg @BrumBrum No RPing the actual Nazis

STATEMENT: EASTERN HAANE
By the Prime Minister, Emryc Isla
Oldknow House, October 4th, 2020

Last month, my Government instituted a complete and total shutdown on travel, trade, and migration between Angleter and Eastern Haane until we could learn more about the situation in that country.

I would like to start by confirming that the shutdown remains in place.

We have, however, learned more about the unfolding human tragedy in Eastern Haane. An entire nation at the heart of Europe has been brought to the gates of Hell following the collapse of a Communist regime under the weight of its own contradictions. Over recent weeks we have witnessed, and the Haanean people have endured, unspeakable savagery. War, torture, and the rise of evil death cults.

It is not Angleter's place to step in and write the Haanean people's future for them. Ultimately, we believe that only Eastern Haane can liberate Eastern Haane. But we respect and support the actions of the four friendly nations who have taken it upon themselves to implement a no-fly zone over the country.

The European Council is expected, in coming days, to sanction a multinational intervention in Eastern Haane. Angleter will not participate, for the reasons I have set out above, and because we continue to work to neutralise the threats on our own borders of Kaasian Sithianism and Neo-Venetian separatist Communism.

But we would advise the nations intervening that the lesson of the last few days is that any intervention must be respectful of the wishes of the Haanean people, and that any reconstruction process must be led by the Haanean people. It is their country, their culture, and their government; not a blank canvas for the globalist elites of Europe to project their fantasies.

We are now subject to the obscene spectacle of Reitzmag claiming that its supremely arrogant, failed intervention was, in fact, a success, because a woman is currently being brutally and blasphemously tortured to death on Facebook Live. Not since the murder of my friend Paul Craticus have I seen such depraved gloating about man's inhumanity to man, with the added injury of that inhumanity being used in a pathetic attempt to present an obvious failure, that cost many lives and further destabilised an already horrendous situation, as a glorious victory. It is a sickening coda to an intervention that will go down as a cautionary tale about the perils of interventions.

Contrary to the words of the Reitzmic government, the situation is not over, and it may well be that European intervention is what restores peace to Eastern Haane. But that would be no time for Europe to congratulate itself. Eastern Haane's brutal civil war is a testament to the failure of the European Union.

While Eastern Haane was hurtling towards chaos, the Internal Affairs Commissioner was driving a fake tank through a refugee camp, ziplining into rallies, advertising his app, going around Europe in a car plastered with his face, and telling us all to pay for his 5G project. That was barely a month ago. He even went to Eastern Haane to take credit for bringing peace to that country. Casting your mind back to this time, it would almost be darkly laughable, if the consequences hadn't been so tragic.

Angleter no longer has any confidence in the ability of the European Union to resolve conflicts among or within its member states, or restrain rogue states. And that, in our view, is what the EU was supposed to be for. We are left, now, being asked to pay for what is essentially a virtue-signalling rules factory and the expensive indulgences of its globalist rule-makers.

I can therefore confirm that the official policy of the Angleteric Crown is now to withdraw from the European Union, subject to a referendum to be held in the winter. We will bring forward legislation to that end in the coming weeks. In the meantime, we will not fill our vacant Council seat. We will not vote in Commission or ECoJ elections.

Should the Angleteric people endorse this path, we will remain committed to bilateral and multilateral relations with friendly EU member states. Our treaties with them will remain valid. We do not intend to disengage from the world; only from an organisation that has become an anarchy in what it should be doing, and a tyranny in what it should not be doing. Should other member states and nearby countries share our view, we would even be willing to found within the region a new multinational organisation that will embody the principles of the EU that a hopeful Angleter joined over 12 years ago.

The people of Eastern Haane deserve to live the rest of their lives in a peaceful, secure Europe of sovereign nations. I hope that the belated action we are seeing now will recover them from the bowels of this Hell on Earth, and begin that new chapter in their long history.

But it is our responsibility now, as a government, to not only look after the interests of our own Angleteric people, but also to call time on our endorsement of a decadent, globalist organisation that has proven itself incapable of preventing these horrors from gashing the face of our region. We owe that to the people of all Europe.

YOU'RE ALL TERRIBLE AND WE'RE NOT VOTING FOR ANY OF YOU
Martha Lane

Four months ago, Angleter's government, for the first time in several years, decided not to cast a vote in the EU Commission elections. The options facing us today are just as bad, if not worse. Once again, we simply cannot, in good conscience, endorse any of the candidates who want to run the region.

Over three successive terms in office, the EPA have proven themselves completely tone-deaf to the concerns of the Angleteric people. The Elected and Accountable Council Act, which led us to withdraw our European Councillor in protest, transformed what had been a restrained body of representatives of national governments into a de facto pan-European parliament, with its own mandate, separate from the member states. But our government, and those of the other democratic member states, were elected to represent their countries on the world stage. We have no time for decrees from Europolis, rammed through by the EPA, taking that responsibility, that legitimacy, away from us.

The EPA's approach to European integration is the worst of all worlds. They want to make the European Council into a parliament, with unequal constituencies (how can over 150 million Angleterics be represented by the same number of councillors as 100,000 Nofoagans?), and impose more and more diktats on the government and people of Angleter. Occasional fig-leafs, like the rebate and the repeal of the Refugee Protection Act, are welcome, but everyone recognises them as fig-leafs designed to buy the begrudging loyalty of the people of sovereignty-minded member states.

Today, Angela Merkel and Jean-Claude Juncker – forced to stand again now after member states shot down his absurd attempt to extend his term – are offering the most radical EPA manifesto ever. Between them, they want to restore the Refugee Protection Act and create an open-borders 'Schengen' area, imposing mass immigration on us all, and even take away our nuclear deterrent. Angleter will not vote for this. If it is imposed, we will not comply.

Unfortunately, as the debates unfold, the despair that enveloped Angleter four months ago has descended on us again. The ELDR, who present themselves as the main alternative to the EPA, only offer a more extreme version of the EPA's Eurofederalism. They not only want to take away our nuclear deterrent and our borders, they want to dip into our rebate as part of a Europe-wide foreign aid scheme, and impose ludicrous restrictions on member states' space programs. Both they and the EPA are engaged in a grotesque race to promise ever more grandiose, ever more expensive, and ever more unrealistic white elephant projects to sink Angleteric taxpayers' money into.

The other candidates fare little better. Dragan Trympov and John Oliver's MEGA, and Sofia Cikarova's PEL, present themselves as 'anti-globalist', but the reality is that they're only against globalism in its current form. They don't necessarily object to the EU making demands of member states, they just don't like what those demands are right now. Mr Trympov's pro-borders, anti-elitist form of globalism might appeal to many people in Angleter, and our government would likely breathe easier under his premiership than any other candidate's, but it is still a form of globalism. Ms Cikarova's socialist form of globalism, meanwhile, does not appeal to many people in Angleter.

This leaves the independent candidates. Walter Cocx has attempted to portray himself as a candidate of the reasonable centre, but his support for the Refugee Protection Act and a European Green New Deal marks him out as an unreasonable extremist in the eyes of most Angleterics. Katrin Weber, on the other hand, appears to have combined the worst aspects of the EPA, ELDR, and PEL in one candidate.

Angleter has disengaged from Europolis for several months now. We have withdrawn our councillor, we have not voted in Commission or ECoJ elections, and no Angleteric has put themselves forward for those offices. We have focussed on bilateral and multilateral relationships with our friends, neighbours, and allies, where it works for us – the spirit of the EU as it once was. More and more Angleterics are questioning whether EU membership actually offers Angleter anything at all. This current crop of candidates certainly doesn't. We can only hope that, unlike last time, whoever is elected this month pulls Europe back from the brink, and restores the spirit of consensus and respect for national sovereignty that was the hallmark of the European Union we joined 12 years ago.

If not, Angleter is unafraid to consider not so much whether we should leave the EU, but whether the EU has already left us.

The Rt Hon Martha Lane MP is Angleter's Minister for the Interior and a member of the Citizen Alliance

UNDISCLOSED LOCATION
NEO-VENETIA CITY
5.15am, MARCH 3rd, 2021

"What?"

"What?"

"Right but that wouldn't; they wouldn't--"

"What?"

Spartaco was struggling to understand what the man on the other end of the line was jabbering about. A helicopter? Stormtroopers? Dalfarra's place? This was not in any of the SRA or the 'official' army's war plans. This was nothing they'd expected at all.

"Are you sure you're no-- right no I could hear that. But enemy can what? Enemy can helicopters? Obviously they can, I can hear them. But why are the Angle-- ohhhhhh. Right, yeah, one moment."

VIDEO-CONFERENCE CALL
VARIOUS LOCATIONS, NEO-VENETIA
5.25am, MARCH 3rd, 2021

Spartaco: OK, thanks to those comrades who managed to get up this morning. We're still trying to contact Dalza and he'll join the call, I'm sure, as soo-- EEE EEE EEE EEE EEE

Audible groans

Spartaco: Right, I've just muted everybody. Use the raise hand function if you want to speak. There's a button, it says 'raise hand'. Don't raise your actual hand. OK? Right. So as far as I understand, the Inimicans have launched an attack on the Speaker's residence, which is also where Marco was at the time. The Inimicans have seized the building but SRA men are on the scene. We've neutralised at least one of their operatives. I'm going to bring in Belisario, from SRA Centre Group Command, who's going to explain the plan.

Belisario: Thanks, comrades. The situation is unclear at the moment, but our objective now is to surround the building and ensure the Inimicans can't leave, with or without Marco and Dalfarra. The Inimicans know our prowess for surface-to-air missiles better than anyone except our dearly departed former PM, so we've put our surface-to-air operations on high alert for any incursions. They might send helicopters, fighters, whatever, from the sea or land, to bail themselves out of this.

Spartaco: Sorry, Comrade Belisario, Comrade Lando from Northern Group Command has a question. Lando?

Lando: Thanks, Comrade Spartaco. Comrade Belisario, do we know why the Inimicans are doing this? Should I be worried?

Spartaco: Comrade Lando, we'll deal with the precise issue later. What is clear is they want hostages from us, so we will take hostages from them. Comrade Belisario?

Belisario: That's right, comrade. Our objective here is to capture, dead or alive, Inimican intruders. We need to teach them that incursions will pay. We need to give them a taste of their own medici--

Lando: It's only, we all know where the buck stops on the action last year, and I d--

Spartaco: Comrade Lando, I'm putting you on mute. You're to stay at your post until further instructions, OK? Comrade Belisario.

Belisario: Thanks again. We need to give them a taste of their own medicine here. Our primary goal is to capture the intruders; recovering Comrade Marco and Comrade Dalfarra is a secondary objective at this point. They are revolutionaries, they know that sometimes sacrifices have to be made for the cause. Comrade Lando might like to reflect on that rather than this undignified yelping, and if he can stop making that hand sign then I'd really apprecia-- can we kick him from the call? Can we please kick Comrade Lando for the call, this is really uncomradely behaviour.

Spartaco: Comrade Lando, you will listen. Comrade Belisario, I think you've summed up our point rather succinctly.

Belisario: Right, yeah, just another update, the Inimican planes have got through already. I can't stress enough at this point how crucial it is we, and I mean both SRA and PANV, get our anti-air into action now, especially over the capital; and our focus is going to be making sure they can't land, and making sure we isolate their intruders on the ground.

SPEAKER'S RESIDENCE
NEO-VENETIA CITY
5.25am

Bandiera's platoon were the first on the scene, having been alerted by the Speaker's security, who had tactically withdrawn briefly to join up with his men. 'That makes 32, 33 of us? Not enough,' he thought. He'd radioed for support, and one upside of being a post-coup regime is that Neo-Venetia city was crawling with troops and other armed personnel; but this advantage was almost irrelevant now.

"Surround them," he ordered his men. "We surround the building, surround their perimeter, and we wait for the reinforcements to attack. Under no circumstances do they break out, do they get any chance to link up with anyone who might land, and for fuck's sake, get the anti-air guns into action! Take them to the side facing the sea, and go, go, go!"

The orders were unorthodox, but broadly effective. The anti-air at least made the Inimican jets dodge a little before proceeding to pick off the SRA men. "Fuck, they're too powerful," said Bandiera to himself, before radioing for instructions.

"Comrade Bandiera, if you're unable to secure a perimeter, then assault the courtyard and prevent hostile withdrawal while reinforcements secure the perimeter instead. Your objective is to prevent hostile withdrawal at all costs."

"Command, does that include the lives of friendlies?"

"Yes."

Bandiera collected a portion of his men and stormed the gates. Almost as soon as he'd burst through, he came face to face with an Inimican major.

Emryc Isla's jaw had slowly dropped as he heard Juncker's proposals. As Juncker continued, he started to laugh, desperately trying to do so as quietly and subtly as possible. He started to weep with laughter when Juncker ejected Cllr Karlssen from the summit like a complete boss. Eventually he composed himself before speaking.

"Sorry, I've got to side with the Bridgemeister on this one. It's almost as if you've gathered us all here, Jean-Claude, to tell us about your plan to double, or even triple, the length of your term, and build a new building for yourself. How do I swipe left on this on your app?"

"If you made promises you couldn't keep in your term in office, that's your problem. We're all politicians, we all have to deal with that. At the very least, the current term should be four months for Premier and Internal as normal, and I'd suggest that if we are to change, we do so at the end of the current Foreign Affairs Commissioner's term."

"I mean, it's just... I can't even... ha... you literally call us all here and your first action, top of the agenda, other than the app, is to say 'hey, how about we cancel the next election and give me a second term', and then Jesus is all 'no, Jean, you're so wonderful, have a THIRD term, no need for elections! And maybe we'll have elections then, and if you win you get SIX terms!' Do you have any idea how this looks to people in Kingswinford, and Damaszka, and Edessa? I'm sorry if my laughing was... is disrespectful, but the people watching the news in Angleter tonight, good grief, if you think you've seen disrespectful, bloody hell."

"The citizens want to get away from you, Jean-Claude. Angleter is deleting the EU app, and we're not paying for Juncker Towers either. You've already beat Trympov, you don't need to have a bigger building than him too."

December 22nd, 2021
Article by: Sophie Hirst

OVER BY CHRISTMAS? BREAKTHROUGH IN DK NEGOTIATIONS

Kaasian regime representatives leave peace talks in Tsetinye, Pravoslaviya

Negotiations to end the Dromund Kaas War have intensified following reports from Angleteric officials that a 'breakthrough' allowing Angleteric troops to withdraw from the decade-long conflict are 'in sight'.

The talks, which were briefly interrupted by an immigration raid by Pravoslaviyan authorities, are now continuing on a 24/7 basis, as both camps are reportedly optimistic about an agreement being reached by the end of the year. Prime Minister Emryc Isla's target of an agreement and withdrawal by Christmas are believed to be slipping out of sight, but the Angleteric camp is hopeful that they'll only miss that goal by a few days.

Sithian regime officials are believed to be agreeing to a range of commitments in exchange for a withdrawal by Angleteric, Duxburian, and other 'Coalition of the Willing' forces that have been fighting to topple the regime since 2011, when a series of belligerent diplomatic actions by then-Grand Moff Wilhuff Tarkin provoked a pre-emptive military response from the region's leading military powers. Since then, however, Dromund Kaas' mountainous terrain has made ultimate victory elusive for the regional coalition, and allowed the denuded regime to dig in around its capital, Kaas City.

Angleteric officials are pushing for the regime to agree to a degree of respect for basic human rights, effective border control in order to prevent a wave of mass immigration to Angleter and other European countries, the disavowal of terrorist activity, and a commitment against the kind of rearmament and regional aggression that led to the start of the war in 2011. While Sithian regime negotiators have held firm on a number of points, it is believed that the devastating effects of the war, including the Duxburian EMP attack at the start of the war, will render many of these points of contention moot, as the regime will lack the capability, let alone the will, to threaten any of its neighbours, let alone the rest of Europe, for the medium term.

Prime Minister Emryc Isla is on borrowed time to conclude both these negotiations and secure Angleter's victory in the Second Neo-Venetia War, where troops are expected to launch an operation into the remaining Communist bases in the coming days. The Prime Minister secured both confidence and supply and a six-month delay to elections on the grounds that an end to both of these conflicts was near, although his commanding lead in the polls was doubtless another factor, and he knows he has weeks before he has to face the public having either succeeded or failed in keeping his core promises.

The remaining military presence is reported to be well-planned for a hasty exit from Dromund Kaas, with some divisions expecting redeployment to Neo-Venetia. No major operations on the Kaasian front have been made for several months, and many troops and much more equipment has already been removed in anticipation of either an agreement or a long-term cooling of military activities in the country. It is believed that a complete withdrawal could follow days after an agreement being signed.

Robert Rice, leader of the Democratic Party, whose government invaded Dromund Kaas in the first place, is an almost lone voice against the negotiations in New Birmingham. He has denounced Emryc Isla for "negotiating with the 9/9 terrorists," and for "selling out our troops and civilian victims in order to meet a manifesto commitment he couldn't achieve on the battlefield," and has predicted that "within 48 hours of this grubby deal going through, the Sithian regime will be back to the oppressive force it was in 2011, and every force for evil in Europe will have its eyes on New Birmingham."

However, after ten years of war, his claims have fallen on largely deaf ears, with the Prime Minister quipping in recent days that "if Robert Rice wants to fight the DK War himself, he's welcome to buy a gun, charter a jet, and do it himself - I won't stop him." According to polling, around 70% of Angleterics would welcome a negotiated withdrawal from Dromund Kaas; and only 35% would support a form of asylum for Kaasians who oppose the Sithian regime or collaborated with coalition forces during the conflict.

@BrumBrum said in Member State Applications:

Nation Name in RP (full, with short name bolded):Clan Democracy of Strathae
Nation Name on NationStates (short):https://www.nationstates.net/nation=strathae
Puppet (if so, of whom?):Brum Brum:Would act as my second nation its a kind of liberal social traditional agrarian matriarchal society and country based mostly around the clan system. The country would feature a wide range of clan traditions unique sports like shinty and the Gael games(based off the highland games in real) and be mostly a rural country based around small villages and towns. Each clan member would get their own plot of land and free labour to build a house with all citizens expected to give 1 day a week to help the community being assigned jobs or volunteering such as litter picking, volunteering for a charity or community centre or helping build another village members house if you want to be able to vote or recieve your benefits. Cities would have social housing schemes built . Only Clan members would get a free house or land.It is an extreme eco country with a co-operative based econmy and extremely conservative immigration policy as well as views on religion , it is very pagan in religion being very pro-lgbt and "womens equality" while disliking any religion that doesn't respect those traditions , seeking as much as possible legally to keep out religious theocrats who would seek a more conservative social policy by world standards. The parliament is based on pr list(each clan getting 2 seats) clan seats which cover the whole country each with 2 seats reserved for non-clan citizens. The upper house is a mix of Clan Chiefs and priests appointed by the Breizhighist branches.The country would be more extreme than Duchies offering more roleplay oppurtunities with potential flashpoints around relations with Catholic and Orthodox faiths among others. Religions like Catholicism, Orthodoxism and Islam would be legal but very much looked down upon as "bigoted" and "sexist" there would be an expectation for such religions to be tolerant of lgbt rights and womens rights and not get involved in politics in the country in regards to these issues if they want to keep their tax exempt status. Thye country is famous for its natural beauty and nationwide laws against meat eating or import of meat allowing only vegetarian food in the country for environmental and animal welfare reasons.

This is a bit more about the state.

Map plot requested:21 or12(Prefer 21)
Flag:![alt text]
Capital city:Sruighlea(Executive and upper house) and Dùngael (Lower house of Parliament and Judicial)
Currency:Copar
National language(s):Gaelic

Head of State (Title + Mr/Ms* + name in bold):High Chieftain Boyd Cowal Cailean
Head of Government (Title + Mr/Ms* + name in bold):PM Ms Blair Gobnet McLucais
Governing party:Party of Tradition

European Councillor (Mr/Ms + name in bold):Ms Sorcha Raghnailt Donnchad

Current participation in other regions (if any):Here
Past participation in other regions (if any):Note in UD application

My country accepts the Constitution and the Acquis Communautaire (Y/N):Y

Approved

@Ramekista said in Member State Applications:

@Angleter is that slot named "E" free?

Hi there! I'm afraid not; that's our regional capital, the Free City of Europolis.

@Republic-of-Korea said in Member State Applications:

Nation Name in RP (full, with short name bolded): 대한민국 (Republic of Korea)
Nation Name on NationStates (short): Hicklebun
Puppet (if so, of whom?): yes, Reitzmag (yeah I know, but I feel like having korea as a puppet would help me learn the language better and learn about said country. plus I think that if this puppet becomes better, I may switch to it as my main nation instead)

Map plot requested: 15

Capital city: Seoul City (서울-시)
Currency: ₩on (웍)
National language(s): Korean (한국어), English (영어)

Head of State (Title + Mr/Ms* + name in bold): President Mr. Moon Jae-In (문재인)
Head of Government (Title + Mr/Ms* + name in bold): Prime Minister Mr. Kim Boo-Kyum (김부켬)
Governing party: Korean Democratic Party (더불어민주당)

European Councillor (Mr/Ms + name in bold): Mr Ban Ki Moon (반기문)

Current participation in other regions (if any): United Kingdom, Empire of Great Britain, Order of the Grey Wardens
Past participation in other regions (if any): (cannot remember all of them as most ceased to exist)

My country accepts the Constitution and the Acquis Communautaire (Y/N): Y

We're not going to approve this

April 21st, 2021
Article by: Florentine Agnell

ANGLEXIT CAMPAIGNERS CALL FOR NEW 'SUPER UNION'

Drake Bell, co-chair of Yes Angleter Can

Angleter could leave the European Union and form a new 'Super Union' with a number of other leading European countries to 'save Europe', according to pro-Anglexit group Yes Angleter Can.

At a campaign stop in Bashan, the group's co-chair, Drake Bell, said that Angleter was not the only country that was dissatisfied with the current situation in Europolis. "It's not just us, there's a lot of countries that put a lot more into Europe than they're getting out. The money's being sucked out of these big countries, and it's not going anywhere. Young people don't care about Europolis any more because you have a lot of poor quality laws, poor quality debate, and councillors being murdered all the time."

The musician was responding to an assertion, made earlier this week by pro-EU campaigner Peter Montfort, that Anglexit would involve 'playing a dangerous game' that could 'destroy Europe'. According to Bell, "we're not going to destroy Europe, we're going to save Europe at this critical moment. Something has to be done; but whenever there's a change, there are always people who oppose it."

Bell continued with an alternative vision of Europe. "If we vote for Anglexit, we can create a new union, a Super Union, with the best countries from around Europe, working together in a way that provides significantly greater economic growth, respects sovereignty; actually gives something to the nation-states and the people, rather than demanding more and more. I can think of, like, 12 countries that'd be interested in that right off the bat."

Yes Angleter Can has since clarified that Bell was stating his own hypothetical opinions, rather than the group's or the Government's official policy. However, his remarks have sparked a heated debate about what direction a post-Anglexit Angleter could take.

Peter Montfort called the idea "an immoral cash grab by the biggest, richest countries" which would "never happen." He continued: "if you want to leave a union to save money, why would you create a new union that costs a little less money; you'd just go all the way, go it alone. And nobody else would join the wildcat union anyway." Twitter personality Tim Alban agreed, saying that the Anglexit campaign's real philosophy was "just leave everyone, believe only one, if you don't like anyone, live alone." Another user suggested that the idea was so unlikely that if it actually happened, then Bell's magnum opus I Found A Way would be an appropriate anthem for the union.

However, Anglexit campaigners took the idea more seriously. Twitter user @PROUDRIHGTWING lauded the idea as "THE FUTURE" and suggested the entire EU except for Istkalen should leave to form the new 'Super Union'. Istkalen recently declared war on Angleter and all other EU member states, only to surrender a matter of hours later, giving Angleter its first completed military victory since joining the EU in 2008. Mary d'Ivry, meanwhile, suggested that Drake Bell's proposal had some merit, but cautioned that "it's going to take some time to realign the region". Robert Kilroy-Silk, meanwhile, said "no more unions" and argued that the only country Angleter needed to co-operate with was itself.

Recent turmoil in Europe has led to a fillip for the Anglexit campaign, which is now expected to poll between 59% and 62% in a referendum. Chaotic scenes in Europolis, the deaths of more European councillors, the situation in Istkalen, and the decision to empower the European Commission to co-ordinate sanctions against member states, have all been seized on by Yes Angleter Can and the governing Citizen Alliance. However, pro-EU campaigners have pointed to the recent resolution of the Caspian crisis, and the muted response to the Neo-Venetia operation, as evidence of EU diplomacy working productively and in Angleter's favour.

PRIME MINISTER'S OFFICE
NEW BIRMINGHAM
08.00, APRIL 5TH, 2021

"Thanks everyone for the early start." Emryc Isla started the meeting, slightly bleary-eyed, before downing his enormous #NOREFUGEES mug of coffee. "I try to keep these to a minimum, as you know, but you'll also know that today marks seven - well, seven and a half - days since the start of our operation in Neo-Venetia, Stella Maris. I'm going to start by giving a short briefing myself on the situation as it stands, and then Field Marshal Timpson will brief you on future plans."

"So, if you look at the map, you'll see we've made significant progress, especially over the last three days. We've met with comparatively little resistance, even in some cities that had been home to Communist and SRA troops before the start of Stella Maris. It's clear that the initial operation was successful in spreading confusion among the regime forces, and that's enabled us to take a number of cities and towns. We took Caparnaon, Tabaria, Carmiel, and Zecanin on the night of March 28th, followed by a short gap. On the 2nd we took Ponovo and Cavalieri; on the 4th we took Acco with no resistance, and reached the coastline; and later yesterday we entered Raffanea, Archas, Santegidio, and Gibelet. Now we've got our tanks and cars to the frontline, progress has been a lot quicker than in the logistical nightmare following the initial operation."

"Unfortunately, our progress is likely to halt in the coming 48 hours. As we predicted, the Communist forces have largely abandoned the plains for the cities and, regrettably, the mountains too. This is their forte. Fighting continues on the outskirts of Raffanea, and as you can see, there are pockets of serious regime resistance in Megido, Southern Caesarea, Antioch, the countryside to the east of Carmiel, the mountainous border areas, and most of all, Neo-Venetia city. This is expected to be the hardest slog. Field Marshal Timpson will now take you through how we plan to address this issue."

Emryc called the Field Marshal over, and he stood by the map.

"We intend to focus in the coming 48-72 hours on clearing the northern plains of resistance as far as Hatay. This will mark the end of Stella Maris as an operation. Two new operations will follow."

"The first of these is Operation Stylites. This will be focussed on the mountain region and the heavily-mined countryside east of Carmiel. Our campaign there will take on the characteristics of a counter-insurgency strategy, which we expect to last in some form beyond the completion of the main phase of the conflict. Our first goals under Stylites will be to completely secure the main towns - the remainder of Raffanea, plus Ferrand and Marra - and to destroy the barracks southeast of Ferrand, which appears to be intended as a mountain redoubt."

"The good news, on that note, is that we fully expect Stella Maris to cut almost all regime forces off from their mountain redoubt within 24 hours. Only about 20,000 men can be expected to hold out there, based on where we intend to reach the border, hopefully later today."

"The second operation is Operation Ouranos. Ouranos is an urban warfare campaign based on the fact that Antioch, Neo-Venetia, Megido, and Southern Caesarea have become de facto military bases. We intend that the next two weeks will be an aerial-led campaign, focussed on eliminating the integrity of the regime's urban warfare capabilities."

"I'll be frank here and say that we must expect significant civilian casualties. We can and will act based on the highest quality intelligence. We can and will provide warnings, generally and, where appropriate, in specific circumstances. But at this point, the regime's modus operandi has become clear. They will use civilian buildings for military purposes, both for anti-air and ground activities. They will use civilians as human shields."

"The second phase of Ouranos will be ground-based, and that will be the completion of the main phase of the conflict; but please recognise that we can only do this successfully, and without significant losses, including civilian losses, on the ground without first preparing the ground from the air."

"Thanks, Field Marshal. I know what's been said there is quite significant, so I'll open the floor to questions."

One hand shot up. "Nigel Martin, Foreign Affairs. As we all know, the last time we went into NV, we had to withdraw due to foreign pressure. How can we expect to maintain the goodwill of the rest of Europe if we're bombing these cities to hell? You're breaking my equipment before I go out to bat here."

"That's a good question, minister," replied the Field Marshal. "It's not for me to lay out the diplomatic situation; but I should stress we will always try to keep civilian casualties to a minimum. The route we're taking is actually the route of least death."

"The route of least fucking death! I'll use that one on the Inquistan ambassador. Fucking hell."

Martha Lane piped up. "Well, it's not like the Inquistans can complain about bombi-"

The cabinet started talking over each other until Emryc banged the table with his coffee mug.

"Look. Nigel, you know as well as I do that our improved diplomatic situation is as much down to our increased strength as anything else. I'm confident we can get through this fine. Europeans get much worse news images every day than any propaganda the CPNV or SRA will be able to come up with."

A few more, more mundane, questions followed.

"Right, I think that'll do. I want to have a vote now. All in favour of Stylites and Ouranos?"

Nigel Martin interjected. "We're voting on them together?!"

"Yes. Would you like to vote separately, Nigel."

Nigel shook his head, slightly exasperated, and raised his hand. The others all raised their hands.

"Then it's agreed. Field Marshal, keep us posted. Thank you."

ACCO HARBOUR
ACCO, NEO-VENETIA
6.58, APRIL 4TH, 2021

"Would you look at that?"

"Extraordinary, isn't it? Did you ever think you'd see the day?"

"Once, in 2008, I thought we'd hold onto it. But after Khatkar... no."

"I hear you, mate. I always hoped, but I never expected. Not after DK too. But look. And we're the first."

"Do you think?"

"Yeah, I think so. Do you want to say it, or me?"

"Say what?"

"Our coastline. This is our coastline. And this: this is our sea."

"Our fucking sea! I'll drink to that, mate."

The two soldiers toasted with their water bottles. One of them took out a giant Angleteric flag, unfurling it from his backpack. He dipped the flag in the seawater before fastening it to the railings on the edge of the harbour.

"One day we'll have a yacht out here."

Area of Angleteric control at 1200, April 4th.

UNNAMED LOCATION
EAST OF CARMIEL, NEO-VENETIA
15.43, APRIL 1ST, 2021

The Angleteric Army had commenced its general assault on Neo-Venetia the morning after Stella Maris began. The amphibious attack along the river had the desired effect of throwing the Communist and Social Republican forces into confusion, and the Caparnaon pocket had been eliminated, and the entire southern bank of the river was controlled up to Zecanin, with another stretch of Angleteric-controlled territory going from Zecanin to the southern border.

Captain James Bishop had the misfortune of being stationed at the most stubborn holdout, the north bank near Carmiel. The Communist barracks east of Carmiel had mobilised quickly on the night of the 29th, and by the 30th, Angleter was holding onto Carmiel by the skin of its teeth. The situation had stabilised, with the front line about a few miles east of Carmiel's outskirts, but the north bank from there to where the river met the border was all Neo-Venetian.

"All units, attack! All units, attack!" The radio squawked and Bishop and his men sprung into action. Again. This was the fourth time in the last 24 hours.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Bishop muttered as gunfire came his way once again, from the surprisingly well-camouflaged Neo-Venetian troops. In the corner of his eye, he saw one of his men drop to the ground. "Come on, advance!"

"Advance! Advance!" Bishop heard his orders ring out as he marched forward, amidst the gunfire. Maybe this time they were getting somewhere. Occasionally the gunfire from one of the Communists' foxholes would stop. Occasionally an Angleteric bomber would do its work and a couple of bodies would fly up in the air. Occasionally one of his own men would fly up in the air. And then he took another step. And then he heard a click.

"Shit! Get down! Get down!" It was Captain Bishop's final order.

Commandant Andrew Derzi made sure that as much of Captain Bishop's body was recovered before the end of the day's operations. Once that was done, the spot on which the captain had last stood fell behind enemy lines again, and the daily report reached Command.

"We lost another 18 men in East Carmiel today, sir."

Field Marshal Timpson brooded over the news. Though he'd served in Dromund Kaas for a decade, he hadn't been used to these numbers, or this action, for several years.

"We know from DK that stubborn pockets sometimes aren't worth pursuing. Get the navy and airforce to maintain control over the river, and have East Carmiel hold the line and entrench. These fuckers can't interfere with our main operation if we pen them in there. And increase the bombing. They've fanned out of the barracks and the villages; it's just empty space. Everywhere else, we go on."

Area of Angleteric control at 0001, April 2nd.

OUTSIDE NEO-VENETIAN BARRACKS
CENTRAL CAPARNAON, NEO-VENETIA
23.36, MARCH 28TH, 2021

Lt Col Amar radio'ed HQ. "Command, this is Group A. Hostiles retreating to barracks, repeat, hostiles repeat- I mean, retreating to barracks. Over."

"Group A, this is Command. Maintain perimeter. Sitrep on anti-air capabilities?"

"Indeterminate."

"OK. Group A, offer surrender terms with a deadline of 0000. Be advised that hostiles are heading your way from the border. Aerial support will be focussed on preventing a breakout from the barracks in the event there is no surrender. Understood?"

"Understood."

Lt Col Amar ordered his troops to cease fire and commandeered a loudhailer.

"HOSTILE FORCES: YOU HAVE UNTIL 0000 TO SURRENDER. YOU HAVE UNTIL MIDNIGHT TO SURRENDER."

There was a brief silence before a single gunshot rang out and Lt Col Amar's loudhailer shattered into pieces. He commanded his men to resume fire. They had 24 minutes to hold out.

00.01, MARCH 29TH, 2021

"Command, this is Group A. No surrender has been made. No surrender. We're getting pushed back, aerial support requested."

"Affirmative. Hold tight Group A, aerial support is three minutes out."

After a few minutes of sporadic fighting, the rumble of aircraft above the barracks reached a crescendo. Drones flew into the barracks and took out many of the barracks' anti-air guns, before the first bombs started to drop.

"Artillery, fire!" Lt Col Amar shouted over radio. The barracks was being pummelled by bombs and missiles from all directions. The bombing continued for half an hour until a makeshift white flag was flown and the surviving Neo-Venetian commander surrendered. The Neo-Venetian troops were disarmed and held in extremely cramped local jails and barrack quarters overnight, pending processing after dawn.

"Group A, this is Command. Your orders are to send an advance group north towards the northern border. Reinforcements will secure Caparnaon in the morning. We control the entire riverbank as far as Carmiel. Groups B and C have attempted to take out the barracks between Carmiel and Ponovo, but that part of the operation has been unsuccessful. All groups are now ordered to encircle the remaining pockets of hostile resistance in their areas."

"OK. Over."

Area of Angleteric control at 0500, March 29th.

@eastern-haane said in Member State Applications:

Today marks the first anniversary of my entrance into RP. With that, I apply for this, with the hope of acceptance.

Nation Name in RP: the Republic of Eastern Haane.
Nation Name on NationStates: Post Fascist Austria
Puppet: Of Istkalen. Istkalen has had a troubled past; one marked by long dictatorship - preparation for democracy, say those who instituted it, but whether this is true is unknown to the people. Some look upon the days of dictatorship with happiness, seeing it as a time of cultural and economic growth; a time of national unity and strength, with a politics efficient and free of corruption. Others, of course, look at it negatively, finding it oppressive, jingoistic, and perhaps even fascistic. Now appears Eastern Haane - troubled, as Istkalen was in 1946 with the institution of dictatorship; and following its path almost to a T, creating the same sectoral chambers it did, centralizing as it did, effectively recreating all the institutions, from politics to economy to culture, that existed in dictatorial Istkalen. With elections approaching due to a scandal involving large sums of money being given to "insane" political parties, mostly dedicated to the holding of seances to long dead and odious political figures, from Franco to Craticus, Istkalen has much to reflect on. What did dictatorship do for it? Is it because of the "period of national development" that it is stable, or was it entirely unecessary? What did the people of Istkalen lose; what did they gain? And what are they to do about the downtrodden but hopeful people of a nation that, while far away, has followed in its footsteps? This and more questions will arise if Eastern Haane returns; for Eastern Haane would in effect be an echo of a dark past; an echo that will and must be heard. The politicians of Istkalen, young, ambitious, naive, some of whom celebrate the authoritarianism of the past, will be forced to see the past now, and forced to evaluate it. In Eastern Haane, too, will the older politicians, tired, trying to bring together a country almost totally shattered, will there be questions from the experience of Istkalen. What do they risk; what do they gain? Is the institution of dictatorship moral? And so on and so forth. EH Is the same EH, ignore what was written previously. Now, of cou

Map plot requested: #29
Capital City: Kiel
Currency: the schilling
National language(s): French, German, Low Middle Helts, Estonian, English

Head of State: the Council of Twelve
Head of Government: the Council of Twelve
Governing parties: Non-partisan.
European Councillor: Ms. Helga Becker

No participation in other regions.

My country accepts the Constitution and the Acquis Communautaire (Y/N): Y

I've discussed this with the other admins and I'm not going to accept this